Dear Mothers,
Oh, I am enjoying having Olivia Jean, 4 years old, to watch each day. (Not weekends.) Yesterday afternoon we went on a picnic. My neighbor friend Linda babysits also, so we all went together. We walked to a park uptown. It's just a short walk of about six blocks. Then later on yesterday, Johnny brought Rose and Romeo to see me. We all had supper. Just goulash. John needed to pick up his lawn mower. Olivia enjoyed playing with the grand kids. I am so surprised that Olivia entertains herself in the mornings and I can write. I thought I would have to do all of my writings about 5:00 in the morning before Olivia got here. But I guess I can still write as usual.
What has been on my heart lately is abused women. Ya know when you talk about "submission" on a group like ours, everyone thinks you mean putting up with abuse and all kinds of malarkey. But we as submissive wives use Jesus Christ as our example. (1 Peter 2 and 3) Jesus didn't go to the cross because He was too afraid to run the other way. Jesus had prayed in the Garden about going. He didn't want to go. But He made a decision to go in His quiet night of prayer. Many times, as the people tried to kill Him, He disappeared in the crowd. He could have gotten out of dying at Calvary's cross. He had a choice and decided to die for the sins of His people. Women of honor are like this. No one makes a woman of dignity do anything that she hasn't already decided to do, made a decision to do.
Jesus carried his cross to Calvary. He didn't go because He was afraid of the soldiers. And once He got on the cross, He could have called the angels to take Him down. He who had healed the multitudes could have healed Himself. The Roman soldiers mocked Him and lied about Him. But He was a soldier of dignity and honor and He didn't answer them back. He didn't need to answer His accusers -- he knew the truth and stood for it. And folks will lie about us as Christian Mothers and accuse us of all kinds of things. What does it matter to daughters of Sarah? Let them accuse you and mock you. A woman of dignity stands strong and tall in the face of accusations. She doesn't answer back. She lets God answer for her. And if He doesn't at the time answer for her, then she is still not moved.
A woman of dignity is a woman who is never caught off guard. She pivots from the inner man, the meek and quiet spirit. But an abused woman is skittish. She flits from one thing to the other. She smiles in front of her husband and when he turns his back, she is unfaithful. She has never made a decision one way or the other to be faithful. She moves by her fears and is like a hungry dog sneaking food when no one is looking. She lies continually about where she was and why it took her so long to get back home. Her husband can't get the truth out of her for anything. And a lot of women like this scream abuse because their husbands won't let them go to work or buy new clothes every week. But these women have a personality of foolishness. They don't understand the woman of honor any more then they can understand their place as Keepers at Home. Many of these women are stingy with their husbands and children. They want what they want and now. They will take a man down and use up all he has and has worked for.
Now I realize children get abused. And they can't help it. They are children and they aren't mature enough to protect themselves. But a mature Christian wife would never live in abuse. One way or the other, she will work her way out of it. Jesus had a wonderful childhood for all we know from the scriptures. He then started His ministry at age 30 and died on the cross at 33. But He lived in a private religious home most of His life. He wasn't beat every day or abused as a child. But when the time came for Him to give up His life, He knew it. No one browbeat Him to go to the cross.
And I realize there are some women who really are abused and don't know where to turn for help. But to me being abused is a choice. A woman of strength and dignity will never allow anyone to abuse her.
The Word, in 1 Peter 3, says while they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. In other words, when a woman has a heart like Sarah, meek and quiet, a man becomes afraid of her. He beholds her pure actions and becomes fearful to cross her. And Dang! Don't any of you give me any dirt on this stuff because I have earned my right to say it. But, see, some of you think that submission is "Yes Sir" and "No Sir" -- it's a lot more then that. We submit to our husbands to win him and the children to Jesus Christ. It's a long hard process sometimes but that's why a Christian wife submits to an unsaved husband. Or one who is saved but doesn't obey the Word of God.
Our behavior as wives is to be holy and set apart unto God. We are to learn in silence and subjection. We are to be holy in our places as keepers at home. Our Home is our ministry. As we submit to our husbands, this is our submission to Christ. And the heavenlies line up with God's authority and under Him is Christ and under Jesus is our husbands. As we pull in under our husbands, then our husbands are forced to pull in under Christ. It is that our hearts are submissive. We have hearts that are humble and obedient.
But we don't always submit to our husband's flesh. If he walks in the house and says, "I want a divorce" then, no, we don't submit. But we have a meek and quiet heart of submission. We soften his heart by our faith in him. That he is the man of our prayers and you think the better of him. And you stay in an attitude of love and holiness. You don't receive his decision to get a divorce. I mean God is on your side. If you are a covenant woman and a woman of honor, then you don't want a divorce. But you must be quiet and submit to your husband. And if he wants you to file for a divorce, you do out of obedience. But you pray that God will intervene.
In the early days of my marriage, Jim came in the door one day after being gone for three months and said, "I want a divorce." Well, I was way ahead of him and was prayed up. I didn't want to laugh in his face so I ran to the bedroom to laugh. I was so glad to see him and had worried so much about his welfare. When I came out of the bedroom, he had Jimmy, 4 years old, sitting on the table and telling him that he was to always love his Mother but that Daddy didn't love her anymore. I laughed like crazy over that. Finally, I looked into Wild Man's eyes and I said, "Oh, Honey, everything will be alright." Jim then admitted that he loved me but was just so tired of hurting me. I told him I was alright and that God was going to take care of us. I didn't stand and preach at Jim as he would have hated that. I would just say then, "Honey, are you hungry?" And I would make him some food. My heart went out to him as he wasn't saved, as I was. My husband didn't know Jesus and my heart of compassion cared so for Jim.
Then I think that time he stayed home for about 2 months and ran away again. His mother died and no one could find Jim. He would hide out for months and no one could find him. Oh, such a troubled man he was. But, see, the Lord has a plan for these men. He wants them to become saved. And, see, a wife can obey God until hell freezes over and nothing will happen. But there comes a day as she is obeying God with her eyes fixed upon Him and not her circumstances. And the appointed day comes and God moves like a mighty wind upon her husband. But no man comes to Christ by the obedience of the wife only. But God moves as the wife prepares the way in the wilderness. She is a John the Baptist calling for her husband to look at the Savior. And one day, on the appointed day, Husband is miraculously saved and delivered.
And ya know, dear wives, as you act like Sarah and you study her in 1 Peter 2 and 3, you will become more like her. You must cultivate your soul and spirit so that you will become the virtuous woman. Virtue means power! The woman of power in this present world is the wife and mother at home. The woman who takes on the cloak of housewifery is the woman of honor and dignity. And the day will come as you follow and are taught of Sarah that you will see your husband come to Christ.
As you submit to your husband and honor him, you are moving the heavenlies about. You are loosing things in heaven and your husband will be loosed on earth. As you stand under the light of heaven through your obedience, you absolutely move the angels to move upon your mate. You sway the heavenlies with your holy obedience to God. When you willingly take up your cross and die daily to self and to this world, you move the Father's heart. And you become a ruby ring upon His hand. And He moves His unseen hand and causes the circumstances to change. Your obedience will come up to His heavenly throne and the fragrance of your obedience will be a fragrance that He cannot live without. You become the Lord's bride and He cannot live without you. You become so precious to Him as He sees your life being created for Him.
And the wife learns holy obedience as Christ did through what she has suffered. She comes through the cross as only God has designed. And she takes it all as Christ did at the cross. She is lied on and gossiped about. And yet she enters a marriage that God ordained and made with His own hands. And as before she suffered more than most wives, she now rejoices as no one else understands lest they went through the same sufferings. She has finally learned the wisdom of God. She wouldn't go through that again for anything and yet she wouldn't trade the experience for the wisdom she learned for all the gold and silver in the world. Because it wasn't gold and silver that brought her through. But it was a holy obedience to God and to Him alone that delivered her and her loving and now saved husband.
And, yes, you can browbeat a man into walking the aisle at church and makin' him say he is saved. But this is not the Bible way. And you will end up with a man who is only good at church and hell at home. What you must aim for is to show your husband by your holiness in the home that we must know God in a personal way. Because church won't take you to heaven, only through the blood of Christ. Jesus must be your God, your only Lord. And as you suffer, dear Christian wife, turn only unto the Lord.
The angels are watching you. And whether you can know it or not, your unsaved husband is watching you, too. As you press on heaven with your obedience, the Lord will pull your husband into a holy place. And a sweet hour of prayer will come and you will see the Lord's miracles and His glory. He promised and He will answer you and give you exceedingly and abundantly more then you can ask or think. He has Promised and He is not a man that he should lie.
1 Peter 3 Likewise ye wives be in subjection to your own husbands that if any obey not the word they will also without the word be won by the actions of the wife. The actions of holy obedience brings the heavenlies into place. And one day this obedience moves the heart of God. And husband hears the voice of God and surrenders his heart to Christ.
Love,
Connie
