Ya know how I told you the story about Jimmy, our son who drove me home from the hospital Sunday night. How he said, "Mom, I would like to get real upset over this but I know you wont have it." Well, there was a second part to this story, too.
I told Jimmy, "Ya know, Honey, the old time Mothers were like that. They were strong. A mother who had children stayed calm, as to not upset all of her family." I mean, you want to keep the faith goin' and not let sorrow and fear take over. I told Jimmy, "Ya know, Gram (my mother) just cheered us all on when Grandpa (my dad) died. The Mother plays a very important role in the healing of the family. She has to hold them strong ... it won't do for the mother to fall apart. She is older and should have a handle on her faith. The young adult children don't have the experience in faith to hold on when things go wrong." And we Mothers teach our children valuable lessons as we stand strong when the winds of adversity blow.
We can tell our kids, "You need God." But they are not impressed with that. Many times a mother must walk alone through the valley of the shadows to show her kids how to do it. Very valuable lessons are taught and cut into our children's souls as we don't fall when Satan pushes us. Oh, I am flesh and blood and so human. So full of fear at times. But if I was a naturally strong person, then God couldn't use me. I have to be able to be easily touched by my children and my dear husband.
We want to be hard sometimes so that we cant be hurt. But God uses us mothers in our tenderness. We are married women and are helpers and not lady preachers. We are to get under our families and under-gird them with our faith and love. Not our perfectness, so perfect that we cant be touched. We are made from our men, their helpers. We should be strong to talk to the doctors and to let them know that we are capable of making it all the way through.
Miss Charlotte was such an encouragement to me in all of this. I wore a nice long winter coat to the hospital. "Conni, you look rich -- your coat matches your eyes." I knew that she was tryin' to add her strength to mine. She knew I was worried about how we would pay for all this luxury. (By the way, I got the coat at the Salvation Army for 2 bucks. But it is a London Fog and is all wool and full length.) But, ya know, we have to be women of strength and dignity. I wanted the doctors and nurses to know that Jim had family that loved and adored him. And that we wanted the best of care for him.
I told his nurse, "Jim is much loved of his children and grandchildren. He is a wonderful husband to me. We have been married almost 40 years." I was covering the fear that was in my heart and I really wanted to say, "Please don't make any mistakes with Jim's life -- I would die without him." But, of course, we are women of dignity, right? And we only open our mouth with wisdom and kindness is the law upon our lips.
Well, I need to get goin' and see what needs to be done for the day. We as the Hultquist Family appreciate your prayers for our dear Jim. He is much better but still in Intensive Care.
