Dear Kitchen Saints,

I lost my best writing yesterday and so I am sending this to Annie to SEND to you. One of my points of yesterday’s lost writing was that the teaching of the Titus Mother in Chapter 2 is chapter 2 verse one. BUT YOU MUST TEACH WHAT AGREES WITH SOUND DOCTRINE.

The teachings of Keeper at Home is the teachings of sound doctrine. And if the older women don’t teach homemaking to the younger mothers it is a blasphemy against Christ. Well, we see this blasphemy in the Christian church of today. The divorce and child abuse that goes on in the church causes the unbelievers to hate God. We are to glorify God with strong Christian families. The world has no answer when it comes to keeping the family going. We are to teach them as believers by our lives.

This morning I was reading an old COUNTRY LIVING magazine from 1982. Those magazines were so anointed when they first came out. I would read them along with my Bible. Well, they aren’t anointed now. But I was prayin’ about the pictures as I looked at them. The old Country homes had jars of flour and sugar out on the counters and on the tables. Jars of spices like cinnamon sticks and vanilla beans, and nutmeg, whole cloves and peppercorns, and many more jars of dried herbs. A pot of homemade soup always on the stove and homemade bread on the table. Always dried herbs and flowers hanging from the ceiling with baskets galore. Baskets of potatoes and apples on the floor under the work table. Usually there was a cat sitting somewhere on a cute pillow in a basket by the kitchen window.

Compare that with today’s style of kitchens we see in modern magazines. The kitchen counters are cleared. The whole house is so clean it looks like no one lives there ’cause no one does. Sure, a house is gonna stay clean if you don’t do anything but sit around the house all day.

In the old days, ‘long towards evening at my house, Dixie and Emily would stop to visit after their chores at home. Well, I had 6 children and my work was never done. Boy, when they would stop here, I would be so embarrassed that my house was in shambles. Not because I was lazy but because I was busy. Every day I made some kind of homemade bread. Either a yeast bread or biscuits or cornbread. I had to cook from scratch. We homeschooled and I worked from morning til night. That was how it was. But still, you want to have things spotless, huh? But Dixie would say, “Well, of course your house is a mess — you have 6 kids. You can’t just make them sit on the couch in a row and not do anything.”

Well, my kids were wildly creative and my house was theirs to prove it. We did crafts and played the piano. The 3 youngest children had harmonicas of their own and played them all the time. But in this age of barrenness and wickedness, a messy kitchen is not popular. But it is common sense. Think of a man’s workshop out in his garage. He has projects out and it’s messy or he ain’t doin’ anything out there. His pants have paint on them and a bit on his face. Jim was always ruining his jeans with paint. But we Country Mothers of the Kitchen must be set free to cook and bake and simmer big pots of soup until our little hearts burst with JOY.

DAUGHTERS OF A NEW REVOLUTION. SISTERS OF LIBERTY. Let’s throw off our shoes and wear aprons over long skirts and declare unashamedly that we are proud to be Mothers of the hearth. Fire tenders who are at home busy and proud of it.

Homemade soup isn’t hard to make. Just get out a pan and go for it. I have even made soup in a big turkey roaster. But what I love most to make my soup in is my big cast iron dutch oven with a bail handle. That’s just a cast iron pot with a thick wire handle.

Well, Baby Olivia Rose needs me so I won’t write out any soup brews this morning, I guess. But if any of you have any homemade soup recipes, please send them in.

Love,
Connie

Dear Mothers,

I went to help my mom on Saturday with her wash and vacuuming. Anyway, we had pizza and a fresh salad for lunch. Mom kept saying how good the salad was and I got to thinkin’ about it and why it was good.

I know you all probably have favorite ways to fix a salad but this is how I fix mine. I take a small plate… that’s a plate smaller then a dinner plate and bigger then a saucer. But, anyway, I dice the lettuce up instead of tearing it in big pieces. I sort of shred it, so it looks like coleslaw almost but smaller. I lay this on the plate in a layer. Then I slice radishes very thin and cut the grape tomatoes in half. I dice up the green pepper and the celery. I lay these veggies on top as another layer. I don’t mix it up. Then I put the salad dressing on the top.

Our John would eat his salad like that but on a dinner plate with a whole head of lettuce. I like my salads thinly cut like that as all the veggies blend together. I don’t like big hunks of stuff on my plate unless it is on a relish plate and finger foods.

It’s good for a housewife to learn to be skilled at cutting and slicing vegetables and fruits. Also when you slice your potatoes to fry, make sure they are all the same thickness as they won’t all get done at the same time. Over the years I have learned to slice and dice pretty fast and to make the produce look pretty and appetizing. A good way to practice is to peel and cook a lot of potatoes. Like try to peel your potatoes without breaking the skin as you go. So you end up with the peeling all in one piece. As you go, you will become skilled in your cutting and slicing.

It’s now relaxing to me to cut up veggies, etc. My children I babysit for love the way I cut up apples for their snacks. Even as a widow, I am slicing up fruit all day long or the children. I cut their oranges in fourths so they can put the fourth in their mouth and smile like a monkey. I say, “Oh, no, Olivia Jean has orange teeth” as she tries to hold the orange in her mouth without laughing. She is 5 and really not strong enough yet to peel an orange herself.

Little ones like their apples and oranges cut up. I used to fix alphabet vegetable soup for my children. I would get the alphabet pasta for the veggie soup. Do they still have this pasta at the store? Anyway, when the children were young, I would cut the veggies for the soup really small. About as small as the canned soups have it.

Love,
Connie

Dear Kitchen Saints,

Ya know in the old days the Mothers of the Home did all of their own baking. A few times a week they made yeast bread. Many of them had large families and would make a dozen loaves a week or more. When they ran out of yeast bread for the week, they made a few batches of baking powder biscuits or cornbread. This was weekly baking.

Then Mother made a dessert almost each day for the family meal. Mother baked pies and cakes every few days. Cookies were not really thought of as a dessert. They were something you ate if you ran out of pie or you needed a snack. Old time Mothers would say “Well, I don’t have a dessert made yet but there is always cookies.” For mid afternoon snacks, Mother would sometimes make a coffee cake with cinnamon and apples. Then Mother made homemade noodles and crackers every week. She made the quick breads “to make do” but the yeast breads is what the family really wanted. Quick breads are made in a hurry! Baking powder and baking soda cause dough to rise quickly and also you bake them in a very hot oven and they are done in a “jiffy.”

If I was just starting out as a homemaker and didn’t know the “the feel” of different doughs, then I would start out with Bisquick from the store. Also I would buy the cornmeal mixes until you know what they are to look like. But we mothers have as much time and more than what the old time Mothers had and we can learn to be excellent bread makers and biscuit bakers. Why Not? You can take your own self through cooking school at home. Let it be fun! Some of you are so very intelligent and the cooking I am writing about is not hard. But make your home like a bakery. Learn to be excellent bakers and cooks.

I learned as a Mom to make such light baking powder biscuits they nearly flew off the plate. But only in the past 5 years have I learned to make good pie crust. I kept watching the cooking channels until I learned the secrets of good pie crust. My pie crusts would taste like cardboard. They looked good but were awful. I was making my pies just like I made biscuits and, oh, those poor pies. Pie dough takes a lot more shortening than biscuits. And after the pie dough is mixed up, it should hold its own shape for a few seconds as you make it into a ball before you add the water. Biscuit dough looks a bit like bread dough and holds its shape.

I personally love to make popovers but Jim never was very crazy about them. Popovers rise because of the beaten eggs and they are light and fluffy inside and sorta crisp on the outside. I have read recipes for bagels. But I haven’t made them.

Jill’s daughter Shelly loves to cook and often just freezes what her husband and son doesn’t eat. For some of us who don’t need to cook that much, we can sure freeze it for other meals. Such as make breads for the week and freeze it and cookies, etc.

The old time Mothers didn’t have freezers and most of their baking was daily fresh or just a few days old. Mother was up each morning fixing lunches for the children to take to school or for husband to take to work. Then after the family was off to their day’s schedules, Mother would start her baking and cooking. Mothers of large families had to be thinking all the time about the food she had to fix for the day.

I was like this, too, as I made almost everything from scratch. It was a lot of work but fun, too. I have old writings lamenting all of my work. But the Lord told me, “Connie, you don’t work that hard because you are poor but because you are wise.” The Lord taught me to be wise through a lot of lack in our home. But if you can just trust in the Lord and be happy, the family will never know that you have to bake and cook or you wouldn’t have anything to eat. Make bein’ poor a lot of fun. Makes the devil mad and that ought to make you happy.

The Romance of Thrift

Ya know some of you Mothers with large families, make the world think you enjoy being poor. Become love slaves to your husbands. Let your kitchens come alive with cooking and baking. Enjoy going to second hand stores and finding old time pots and pans and aprons. I have a pink hand mixer I found a few years ago.

The old time Mothers loved their families and they gave themselves whole heartedly to their husbands and his children. She was sold out to her family and home and she could give a hoot what the world thought of her. While the other ladies were out shopping and catting around, she was at home in love with her husband and her kitchen. It’s downright sexy to make your husband’s bread. Whoa Nellie!

And ya know in all the good Fairy Tales you read, you never hear of a haughty lazy wife whom everyone loved or admired. No, it was the Cinderellas and the Snow Whites who had good and loving hearts and loved to keep house. The ladies of yesteryear were always lovely to look at with long pretty hair and flowers in it. Flowing cotton skirts with a broom in their hands. She loves babies and her Prince Charming loves her for her womanly ways. A home graced with sexual contentment will make your bread rise. Happy bubbly bread always rises first.

The feminists of this day would have been called crabby fish wives in the old time Fairy tale books. Mostly wives with tall black hats and scraggly teeth. Instead of sweeping the floor with their dirty brooms, they ride them on dark windy nights. But the truly romantic wife is at home sewing and making soup. She doesn’t care if her husband brings home rotten apples for supper… she praises him anyway for bringing something home for supper. She is a true Pollyanna and her true Prince is Jesus Christ. And if her husband is truly poor, she takes a vow of poverty and lives only under her beloved as she sews and cooks and bakes. She does him good all the days of her life.

Love,
Connie

Dear Mothers,

Yesterday as I got back from the store and I pulled into the driveway, I saw our neighbor pulling in. John is a young father of three children under 5 and a precious wife Molly. “I bet the children are all excited about Christmas,” I yelled to him across the driveway. “Are you all staying home for Christmas?” And John, tall and so handsome, told me that his family would go back to Texas. “Well, actually they will stay in Texas as I have been called back to Iraq. I was there once but I am being called back.” We talked a bit and I told him about Jimmy, our son. I wondered if Jimmy would be called back, even though he is 40 years old. John told me that he was 30. I told John, “I will pray for you. You can count on it, John. I will pray.”

I walked back into the house and I thought of the Depression era Mothers. How many times did these old time Moms hear a conversation like this I had just had during 1940 when World War II broke out? They were just coming through the Depression. What must they have thought? Losing their sons to war. Will our government have the draft again? Maybe so… kinda looks like they might. But ya know the old time Mothers seemed to know how to handle this. They had a confidence, it seems, that I only understand when I write. I mean these women seemed to hunker down and pulled deep from their resources as women. Not even especially women of God. They seemed to know how to catch ahold of their emotions and walked out a faith in themselves as mother, wife, and homemaker. Of course, they were brought up that way. I mean you had supper on the table in the evening, even if everyone had died except you and your dog.

There was a religious order in the family no matter what. I mean even if you didn’t know the Lord. But now days we are seemingly sky high and our feet don’t seem to hit the floor. Our Home order is off. It used to be when Mother was upset, she would iron or make bread. Or she would do the dishes, hoping there was dishes to do. When we would go to Dixie’s and she would give us coffee and pie, Jill and I would get up to leave and would want to wash the dishes before we left. I remember Dixie saying, “No, don’t do the dishes — it will give me something to do.”

When the old time Moms were upset, they scrubbed the floor… they tried to stay busy. They didn’t get busy to make the house look pretty. They got busy to stay sane. Jill has often told me that she decorates the house, etc. for therapy. She says that if she gets a space of time that she can be alone, she gets so excited to do her homemaking. And she decorates with anything. But it is her gift and once she gets started, she can’t quit. But I do believe this is how the old time Mothers made it through. And they did make it through or we wouldn’t be standing here today.

But when Mother knew hard times were coming, she counted her losses and her blessings. She somehow knew to be quiet and to make her home strong. She would make a pot of tea and sit down in her kitchen chair and quietly figure out what she should do. Most women didn’t go get a job. I mean if the husband was working, then she made do on his wages, one way or the other. And Mother, of course, put her own family first.

Even the women who didn’t know the Lord as Savior had the knowledge to put family first. The Mothers of faith had started our country. So many Mothers in my neighborhood at home had a godly pattern of life, even though they didn’t know the Lord. Because back in their family some place, a godly mother made the rules. The Mother is lawmaker of the family. Forsake not the law of thy Mother. This means a godly mother. We are to honor an ungodly mother but we are not called to obey her. But ya know now, thanks to feminism, we as mothers seem to be lost and forsaken. And right how we need so much to walk in order.

White Trash

And ya know it seems feminism hit right when it would do the most damage. It’s like fear and disorder took over in the home and now our country is in so much trouble. We are scattered with fear and confusion. Satan has caused anxiety and disorder in the home so that folks will be easier to capture when the ax falls. This is why the black slaves were so easy to handle as their families were so often upset and the father was taken or the mother of the family. They couldn’t get a handle on a strong home life. They were never allowed to own land or to develop any independent skills for daily survival. When they were set free after the Civil War, they didn’t know what they were free to do. Still the landowners made them rent land and the blacks gave them most of the profit they made off the cotton they sold. And so many of us are living like that now.

Folks in the old days would live in a shack or a chicken coop until things got easier. Mother cleaned it and made a decent place to live. Folks did what they could to survive and the heck with what others thought. See, now days the landlords are owning so many of you. You have to pay half of your paycheck for rent. You won’t rent a cheap apartment and clean it up and bide your time until things get better. It’s that you are paying for a lifestyle and not a life. You are being owned and you don’t know it. But materialism has caught you and won’t let you go. It’s like if the world says you are OK, then, “By Golly, you are OK!” The old time folks would have seen the handwriting on the wall and not paid the high rent but put their money into a place of their own.

But the American system is oppressing us to the bone. We are like bugs banging into lightbulbs that already have a 100 bugs dead in the lampshade. Hello? We have to back up and STOP letting Satan oppress us and go by his rules. We can’t do it, anyway. Some of us are between a rock and hard place. We keep running into the same old wall. And God knows we don’t have the strength to tear it down with our hands. We have to back up to God and fall into His arms. We need to sit down and count the cost.

We are wives and mothers, keepers at home. Our grandmothers and great-grandmothers made it through worse then this before. They went through the Depression; some lost their farms. They went through wars and sadness as we will have to face, too. But Mother didn’t give up and she carried on and we are her daughters and great-granddaughters. My home is over 100 years old. I bet some brave women lived here. I pray I am one of them.

All is Well

We do, in reality, face trouble on every side. Dear Wives and Mothers, I hear ya. And, yes, we depend upon God but also we must depend upon the wisdom of God.

Ruby is a voice from within. She is instinct. She is our strength as we walk as keepers at home. The Bible in Proverbs says that wisdom has a voice and we must hear her. She is the virtuous woman who looks well to the ways of her household. She is rare. You won’t find her in flocks of women. Her husband’s heart trusts in her. She does her husband good and not evil all the days of her life. She seeks work to do and she works with willing hands. She does not hear the voice of feminism but she hears the voice of wisdom. I heard her voice this morning calling me back to my home and my place as Keeper at Home.

All of Ruby’s children are taught of the Lord and great is their peace. Ruby is not afraid of the terror by night or the arrow that flyeth by day. Ruby knows the angels are there with her and under His wings she trusts. Every wise woman builds her home and the foolish tear it down with her hands. Contentment and harmony reign in Ruby’s home as she has put her trust in the Lord.

And the great cloud of witnesses cheer us on. Mothers of the past who see us from heaven cheer us on, knowing that we can make it. Just as they did, we can make it, too.

Love,
Connie

Dear Mothers,

I am writing more about keeping a home organized as Kelly on our response group has asked me about it.

Ya know my son Jimmy was in the Navy. He went in at 18 and then I still had two teens in the house and three little ones under the age of 5 years old. Jimmy was an American spy. He was a part of a flight crew that flew over enemy territory and Jimmy had to read the computers and tell if there were any bombs in the area. To make a a long story short, we never knew where he was in the world as he couldn’t tell us. But often he came home on leave and we wouldn’t know when he was coming. Along towards evening, he would give us a surprise phone call from the airport. And then Wild Man would go pick him up.

One time the house was in a worst shambles then usual. I was about to cry, as I knew Jimmy and Jim would be back form the airport in about an hour. I called MaryL, my mentor. She said, “Connie, just make a nice meal and make sure you have it done by the time they get there.” Well, I hurried off the phone and got to cookin’. After I started a nice meal, I began to clean the living room and the children helped me. I was able to welcome our son and have a nice family dinner made for him. I can’t remember what I fixed. But when he was on leave, I would often invite family friends and neighbors over to visit Jimmy.

Two standard cakes I made were icebox cakes. Then we would have ice cream and soda or juice for the kids and coffee for the adults. The two cakes were very simple to make in two 9 by 13 cake pans. One was a chocolate cake mix and the other a yellow cake mix. After they were baked, I would put a chocolate pudding mix spread over the top. And the yellow cake, after it was baked, I put a vanilla pudding mix over it. Then I kept them in the fridge or covered on the front porch to stay cool. These cakes were simple to make — I never ran out of cake.

I would always have the children sit in the living room around the coffee table and the older folks sat where they pleased, usually at the family table. The children knew the adults were to be respected and they could sit where they wanted. Even though Jimmy was the Master of Ceremonies, he sat in the living room on the couch, balancing his paper plate on his knees. Our old milkman would yell in Jimmy’s ear, “So how is the United States Navy?”

Dick, our milkman, just died recently at 86 years old. He was at Jim’s funeral. But he was hard of hearing and always yelled. He had delivered milk and butter to us since 1973. He stopped in about 1997. He was a good Christian man. Our family will never forget him. He always knocked at the door and came on in. “ANYBODY HOME?” Jim could have popped him a good one many times but, thank God, he never did. Dick came when he pleased when he was goin’ by the area. He would switch us around and come even at night after the kids were in bed. The house would be asleep and here comes Dick, yellin’ “Anybody home?” I would ask Dick quietly if he could come in the daytime when everyone wasn’t asleep. But he said he had to come when he was driving by. Oh, what a character. Of course, the kids loved him and when they heard him come, they would jump out of bed and run to see him.

Dick also raised goats and would drive around with a big goat hangin’ out the back car window. The kids loved that and would run to pet the goat. I wanted a goat, too, for the back yard but Jim said “Absolutely not!” But our Dick started out delivering milk in about the 1940s and used a horse and cart.

Dick would come in and ask if he could use the bathroom and, as he ran by, I would ask him if he wanted a cup of coffee. Jim would motion with his eyes to me that he was not in the mood to entertain the milkman. Our lives were so ridiculous! Sometimes Jim would visit with Dick. The conversation was always … well, I would excuse myself and leave the room.

We do have fond memories of Dick and all the old family friends.

Family Order

But ya know when you are having guests with a big family, it can get crazy. But like MaryL has always told me, “Connie, folks notice if you make them feel ‘Welcome’ and if you have a nice meal ready.” And this is so true. I mean, yes, keep the house clean but mainly make sure you welcome your guests and have the coffee on and a snack — especially if your guests have been traveling for a long time to get there.

I am such a feather brain and what you see is basically what you get here. Like Aunt Toot says, “The coffee will be on and a pile of laundry will be sitting in the chair.” I don’t notice the obvious most of the time. I mean ya gotta live and let live. No one’s house is perfect. But my life as a homemaker usually pivoted from the kitchen. It had to. I didn’t buy a bunch of junk food as I couldn’t afford it. Our kids couldn’t go to the fridge and pick something up to eat unless it was fresh fruit or something. It was a treat for them to have cold cereal. So I had to make three meals a day. I spent most of my time in the kitchen.

My kids would vacuum and pick up as they had to. I tried to have the house picked up when I knew Jim would be home from work. And to me, it is so dishonorable for a wife to have company when her husband just arrives home from work. I would tell the children’s friends if they had been there for the afternoon, “Well, the kids’ Daddy will be home in a bit so I will have to send you children home.” And then then our kids would help pick up. Jim wasn’t hard to please as far as my homemaking, so things were far from spotless. But, no, I didn’t expect Jim to come home from work and not be able to even get in the door for the toys. And ya know the children and I had watched TV during the day. And we let Jim watch what he wanted when he got home and we let him rest in his chair for a while and have a cup of coffee. And I would have dinner about ready. But ya know to me that is just common courtesy. If I had to work all day, I would want someone to give me a break when I got home. And I mean, yes, we had emergencies, plenty of ‘em. And many times, Jim had to come in the house a-runnin’. But I did strive to keep the house half way quiet for when he got off work. I mean as much as possible.

I would overhear many conversations and Jim always talked about “Connie and the kids.” We were precious to him as he was to us.

No, my house is often stacks of things here and there waiting for me to unstack it. But the main order in the family is contentment and harmony. Make a happy nest for the family, dear Mothers, and let the rest of it all fall into place. Always put husband first. He is not Mama’s helper. Teach the children to honor Daddy and he will teach them to honor you.

Love,
Connie

When my children were all home at different ages, I tried to keep one main schedule. This was before I began to homeschool in 1988. Early in the morning after Jim went to work, I would top clean the living room. I would spend like about 10 minutes in each room, just top cleaning, no vacuuming yet.

The last room I would do was the kitchen. I would plan a family meal and start my cooking as I did breakfast dishes and cleaned up the kitchen. I tried to have an idea for a menu for the week. So in the morning I would either make salads or a dessert. Or made bread if I was out. Also I would put something in the oven or crock pot. So I had almost the whole meal cooked by 10:00 a.m. for the evening meal. Just refrigerate it or whatever. When Jim was at work at lunchtime, the kids and I would just eat leftovers or sandwiches. But I had a big family meal each day either for lunch or supper. But ya know in the winter, it was nice to bake or cook in the mornings as to warm the house up. And in the summer, the day is cool in the morning and it’s a pleasant time to bake. So around 10:00 I would have the supper meal figured out and the house was sort of a mess but at least organized. Then you, as mom and wife, feel happy as you don’t have to think about supper for the rest of the day.

Then late morning, you can do more cleaning and do the wash and vacuum. At noon, stop for lunch and then take a nap with the children or just by yourself. It’s a good time to read the Bible and pray. After your nap, you may have a special project to do like a deep cleaning of a room.

Try to just go to the store once a week. Plan one day that you just run errands and go to the store, etc. Then you can stay home most of the week. Running about takes a lot of time and energy. I would recommend making out a general idea of menu each week. That way you can plan a simple meal in the crock pot for the days you have to be gone all day.

Anyway, after your afternoon break, then you can start straightening the house for the evening meal. And after supper should be a time to be with the family until bedtime. It’s a good time to maybe do your crafts or sewing with the children. You have to feel … well … like anyone, that your day’s work has to end sometime. The evening can be spent reading to the children or playing with Baby. Giving baths and enjoying the children. It’s a time for Mother to relax and to read to the children about the Lord. A time to talk about God and listen to the children’s prayers. A private time for the family with no interruptions from the phone. No late visitors except they be invited and are family friends for the whole family to enjoy. Our children and their friends should be our friends, too.

My children loved to see Aunt Toot coming to our house. And, oh, they loved Jill and Dixie and Mary and Russ. I wouldn’t have let anyone in my house that didn’t love my children. Johnny would have been bored to death if he hadn’t had Aunt Toot to tease. He shot her with invisible ink on her new outfit. Oh, he loved to tease her. We set her in a chair that was wood and it collapsed to the floor. Then we said she broke our new chair and she should be ashamed. “I didn’t break it; I just sat down in it.” We said she must have gained weight. Jim had just gotten the chair at the Salvation Army and it was barely stuck together — no glue. But whatever works, ya know.

Aunt Toot was always good for a laugh. She had these food stamps and had to buy a package of gum at each gas station on her journey to my house. This way, she would have the change from a food stamp dollar to buy gas to get here. She must have been desperate for a laugh.

Dear Mothers,

Last evening for supper, I fixed Jim’s favorite old-fashioned gravy. I haven’t made gravy since my beloved passed to heaven. But I made a good dinner last night and the gravy tasted so good. What a comfort food!

First off, I got out my big cast iron skillet and fried about a fourth pound of hamburger with a few onions. Salt and coarsely ground black pepper. When the meat was done, I took it out of the pan and put it in a bowl. Then I fried potatoes in the meat scrapings. Add a bit of oil if ya need to. Then after the potatoes were done, I put them in the bowl of meat. Then I made gravy in the fryin’ pan. And, oh, was it good. I haven’t eaten much but here and there unless the kids are here. And even then, I didn’t make the old time gravy. But, oh, I made a pig of myself eating that gravy last night. It tasted so good. I saved some to eat today, too. I wanted to make biscuits but didn’t have the heart to do it. But that will come, too.

But, oh, the comfort foods are so cheap and good. They take time but it is worth it. I took it all for granted, I guess. Jim just wouldn’t eat the quick meals for long. Like if I fixed spaghetti and then we had maybe chili the next night? Boy, about the third day, Papa would say, “Hey, I am hungry — I need some real food.” Meaning where’s the potatoes and gravy? And with the potatoes and gravy and meat, he wanted a canned vegetable. Jim worked hard almost up until he died. He was out in the cold doing things and needed the heavier foods.

Ya know back in the old days, most Mothers who were God fearing kept a sweet, quiet home. The kids had chores but Mothers work was “her work” and was sacred almost. I mean the Dad did the outside work like shoveling the walk and mowing the yard. He was the bread winner. He drove the car and kept up the repairs on the car and the house. The children were expected to pick up their toys and not throw their clothes in the floor. But you never entered a home where Mother was screaming at the kids to do their work. Mother’s job was as keeper at home. I mean the children helped with chores but everyone knew it was Mother’s job and she took pride in it. She had the main burden of household duties. Her husband’s home was his castle. When Papa came in the door after work, no one expected him to do anything but take his shoes off and read the paper. He sat in peace as he smelled supper cooking. His wife was there in the home caring for the children and keeping the home fires burning.

My Mother was always home and had supper on the table at 5:00. If we children came home and the house was empty, we thought someone had died — and usually someone had. To not have supper on the table at 5:00 was unthinkable. And I always ate like a bird at every meal as a child. I only ate my meat to make my brother mad as I knew he wanted it. He would say, “Connie isn’t even hungry; she just wants to eat that meat ’cause she knows I want it.” I guess my meanness kept me alive. But the old time Mothers at home kept the peace through the order of the home.

The Father of the home didn’t cry or express himself like a girl and no one expected him to. Men didn’t cry and act like a sissy. When I was about 13 or so, I said about Elvis Presley, “Oh, I just love him — he is a doll. He is so cuuuuute!” My dad looked at me and said, “Why do you think a man is good looking if he looks like a doll or is cute?” That about made my dad sick. Dad had fought in World War II and had many medals of honor for bravery and courage. Later on in his life when he was old, he tried to help Mom in the kitchen and I hated to see him do that. I asked my Dad about 10 years before he died why he didn’t want to come to Christ. And he told me that when he was in the war and his friends knew they were about to die, they would start calling on God. Dad thought they were a bunch of cry babies if they only thought of God then.

And ya know Jim’s greatest heartache was that David and Tiff hadn’t married yet and still aren’t married. Jim told David, “Be a man and take care of your family.” He would tell David, “I never raised you to just shack up with a woman.” The old timers called living together “shackin’ up”. The boys always talk about Jim saying to them, “Ya don’t wanna be a sissy, do ya?” The boys say that this is what they remember most about their Daddy. He always told them to work and take care of their wives and babies. “Be a man … pay your bills and protect your family.”

Jim loved the Lord. Well, he wasn’t as spiritual as I was. But he was a simple man and knew the foundation of the Word. “Ya take care of your family. You are to get off your ass and work.” And my boys always have a job. Dan travels all over and always goes into a city and has a job in a day or so. Not the best job but he gets one until something better shows up. All of my sons and sons-in-law know how to work. Jim didn’t hand them money as children and they had to make money or go without and they knew it. Well, heck, our family hardly watched what folks thought of us. Hey, if Jim had to be a dishwasher until something better showed up, then Jim was a dishwasher. And I never worked. And Jim always said, “Honey, you have enough to do right here with the kids.” And when all the kids grew up, he said I still had plenty to do … and I did.

Jim respected my role as keeper at home and I honored his role as breadwinner and the head of the house. Sure, and sometimes these roles will blur. But mainly we should stay on our roles as this brings peace and comfort to the home. Yes, if your husband likes to cook as Jim did? Then, yes, that is fine. But the burden should always be on the mother to make the meals as this is her place as keeper at home. Or if you, Mother, are sick or in an emergency, it’s nice if the husband will make a meal. But the Mother should really thank him and appreciate it as this isn’t his duty. It shouldn’t be taken for granted or be expected of our men. I know this writing is for someone — I don’t know who.

I know I am making some women livid. But this thing of makin’ men “Mama’s Little Helper” is what has caused our men to die in their manliness. And it has scattered the wives and mothers at home as they feel they have no place. If they are out at a Bible study with the other chickens, they feel no call to home as the afternoon wears on. They don’t think about the family coming in from work and school and will they be hungry and tired. They only think of themselves and what they think religion is sayin’ to them. But God is saying to them to go home and minister to their own husbands and children. To get busy in the kitchen and make a meal and make a quiet home to come back to.

Our families need the comfort of home to refuel themselves. Mother can be home and it is a privilege to be home. I am so happy I haven’t had to leave my home as I can stay prayed up in an atmosphere of peace and safety.

Love,
Connie

Dear Kitchen Saints,

Ya know Jim and I raised six children. And it wasn’t easy, either, as some of you know from raising your own large brood. Between Aunt Toot’s family and mine, we represented thirteen children. She had seven. And we often traded recipes or told each other where the best buys were.

Often when I would go to the store with Jim, I would pray for good buys and the Lord would show me hidden produce or something marked down. But often Jim would show me something to buy and I would say or he would say, “Well, we don’t need that — we can make that at home.” We would buy a lot of flour and yeast and things to make bread and biscuits and homemade pancakes. We would buy the old fashioned oatmeal for our family and make that instead of the expensive sugar cereals. But I would just pray silently, often alone in an aisle, and I would say to the Lord, “Lord, I am not goin’ to buy anything I can make at home with my own hands.” And I would think of the Mothers during the Depression era and ask the Lord what Wisdom would do about this or that need. I had an imaginary older Titus 2 Mother who I called Ruby that I would write to as I made out my grocery list. Ruby lived in a cabin in the woods and she had huge vegetable and herb gardens. And as I would go to the store, I would think of her and how brave she was to feed her family from what she could make with her hands. And I would pass up the paper towels and napkins as I thought I can make napkins and use cloth ones. Or I can use rags as paper towels.

If you have like six cloth napkins, just take a big safety pin and pin them together before you wash and dry them. This way they will all stay together. And you should have about three sets of them. They are super cheap at garage sales or just make some out of some scraps of material.

One thing the early mothers always had was a good set of rags. She had rags for dusting and some for cleaning the floor but never did she use her dust rag for anything but dusting. And her rag to scrub the floor was never used for anything else, either. Then the dishrag was just for dishes. And then she would have a little washcloth by the sink to wash Baby’s face and hands after a meal. Because if you wash Baby up with a dishrag, he could get a rash. But Mothers were very clean and didn’t use one rag for more than what it was to be used for. The world says to use disposables in order to just use it once and throw it away because of germs. But ya know Clorox bleach will get rid of germs — just use it on all of your rags. They even say that scientists put down some AIDS virus on a table and put bleach on it and it killed it. But anyway, the old time Mothers had a lot of rags but they kept them in order.

Old T-shirts make good dusting rags. Just cut the back out in a square. And put your dust rag on a special rack inside the sink door. Then old flannel shirts make good rags, too. Any old used clothes that will absorb well. Anything that is all cotton will make a nice rag.

Then make your napkins out of a nice print material. You will only use them for the day, anyway, and they don’t have to be real absorbent. I remember Aunt Toot telling about having some missionaries at her house and she didn’t have any napkins and they asked her for one and the kids got them some toilet paper. And ya know when ya need toilet paper, ya need toilet paper. And we had to buy that but used this also for Kleenex.

Then you do need a little pile of rags you know you will be throwing away. Like if the dog throws up or something, you will want to just throw that away. And back in the old days, we used cloth diapers and rinsed them out in the toilet and also the washrags we used to clean Baby’s bottom. You just soaked the diapers and rags, then washed them every few days. The stay at home mothers couldn’t afford such luxuries as disposable diapers. You just used them when you went on vacation and couldn’t wash diapers.

I have never bought expensive cleaning detergents. I just have Comet cleanser and bleach and vinegar to clean the house with. I use a wad of newspapers to clean the windows with a pail of water with vinegar in it. The old time Mothers used a lot of vinegar to clean with and cook with. Of course, they made their own vinegar.

But ya know we can always make it in this life, right? One way or the other? But we can’t go by this world’s system or “What will the neighbors think?” We have to have an imagination. And we can think “What would Ruby in her cabin do if she faced hard times?” We who stand here and read these writings are living proof that the Depression era Mothers made it and kept their families alive through many trials. And we have “that way” in us, too, as we are a product of the Rubies of yesteryear. Her love and prayers. We are stout hearted, too, and can spit into the wind and not have it smack us in the face.

As the times get darker and the Lord separates the girls from the women of God, we will be called upon to keep our homes. We will be called to some bulldog tenaciousness. Some Stay-at-Home grit! We won’t leave the ship. And Nehemiah taught the believers to fight with weapons in one hand and a tool to build in the other hand, and we will do the same thing. They say the Depression era Mother helped win the war as she stayed in her kitchen. In 1940, I think, is when WW2 started. And the Mothers had to use Rations Stamps because of the food shortages. Plus they needed the food for the soldiers in the War. But these Mothers were up for it. And we will make it, too, in our world today as stay at home mothers.

Love,
Connie

Dear Mothers,

Good Morning. I have enjoyed Mz Violet’s writings. I know you all do, too. She writes so nice and quiet. And me … oh, Lord Jesus, come quickly! It’s all too much for even me and I write it. Yesterday, when I wrote all of that, I was playing with Olivia, 4 years old, and taking care of 6-week-old Olivia Rose. But I am sure the way it read, you probably thought I was chopping meat or something. I vowed today that I am going to write nice and quiet. That’s a tall order for a lion tamer.

Last night in the night, I suffered like a dog, but the Lord delivered me and I am just fine now. If it were not for Jesus Christ, I would be as dead as a doornail. And most people who write don’t write out that they were almost as dead as a doornail the night before. But with me, it is what you see is what you get. In my day, nice ladies never told all like I do. But I just figure with all the falderal out there, I didn’t want to add to it. And, heck, I figure I will only be on the earth about 20 more years, at the most, and then I will leave this earth behind and never look back.

I told the Lord this morning, “Ya know, Lord, I should have never had kids. What was I thinking?” With Jim’s and my genes the way they were and I had 6 children? What a gambler! Most of ‘em are halfway alright, anyway. Well, it depends on what you think is alright.

Dan is in this rock band? Well, he is in NYC right now, but is ready to go to Oregon to be with his band. Those punk rockers are a scream. A few days ago, they send me a postcard. I thought, “I get a postcard from the band?” This boggles my mind. Casey, the head of the band, tells me the news. And that Dan will be coming to Oregon and they will all be home for Christmas. Then that evening, Christian Joy calls and Jason got a new accordion over Ebay. Chrissy wanted him to play me a song over the phone. It sounded like he was playin’ the polka all the way from NYC. If I was writing fiction I couldn’t make up a funnier life then this one I live.

And Christian Joy is trying to get into this deal for her clothing designs that she could make a million bucks. Some kids go to NYC to make it big and then they don’t and they come home. My Christian Joy went to NYC and really did make it big. Of course, why not? And on her website is a link to Happy Housewifery? Hello? Don’t ask me — I just live here. And, anyway, Christian Joy says, “Mom, if I get this big deal I am after, then you won’t have to babysit anymore and I will buy you a real computer.” (I have an email machine.) I told her I would babysit, no matter how much money I have. I love children about me.

But ya know the way the punk rockers love me, I just wonder if I will go on the road with ‘em? I used to tease them and play the piano and ask them if I could be in their band. They would seriously, with no smile and spiked hair, tattoos, and earrings say, “No way — absolutely no way.” Really, I can’t figure out why punk rockers love me. I think my kids tell them tall tales about Jim and me. Well, maybe some of those tall tales are true?

Well, I have to laugh this morning! For some of you new ladies coming on, “Welcome to my world. Sorry, what you see is what you get.” And I wanna tell you all, too. Aunty Tootie came over the other night to minister to me. I value her friendships so much. I don’t think I could make it without her. Please pray blessings on her today and all of the friends who came to pray with me just lately.

Housewifery

I just love Mz Violet’s writings because they are so soothing. They are a nice balance to my firewater.

One thing I wanted to write about is this. Mz Violet was talking about clothes and ironing and all. In the winter, I like to wear the long skirts with long underwear under them. Well, when it gets really cold, I wear cut off jogging pants under my skirts. I love to go to the Salvation Army and get big sweaters. But on the days I bake, I like to wear sweatshirts with my skirts. An apron fits a lot better over a sweatshirt. But I don’t like the shirt at the bottom to bunch my skirt up. I like for them to lay flat and loose. So I take my scissors and cut the ribbing off the bottom of the sweatshirt. Also I like to wear the shirt sleeves rolled up? So I cut the ribbing off the sleeves, too. Then I roll them up. It makes the shirt look a lot more feminine and it’s more comfortable with an apron. Usually, you can find cute sweatshirts at the second hand store.

Mz Violet, I know you would hem the bottom of the shirt and the sleeves. But you don’t have to, as the material doesn’t unravel. But to hem the bottom would be good practice for some of you ladies to learn how to hem. Just take a needle and thread and sew the bottom edge up. Turn it under twice. If you don’t know how, just ask someone around 40 years old. A package of needles and thread is only about a buck at the Dollar Store. Now see, Mz Violet, I taught my girls and boys to sew and embroider, etc. But a lot of women were never taught this. And some have no idea even how to iron a pillowslip. They have never held an iron in their hands. If a button falls off, they throw the shirt away. So I try to encourage them to do some simple sewing projects. And keep writing on the art of ironing, as we love it.

Another way to make an apron is this. Just go to the Salvation Army and get a cute prairie skirt that you like and cut the back out of it. Cut it on the seams so the seams are already there. And get a cute tie to tie it with and you have an apron.

In the 70s, the housewives used to make jeans skirts. You had one Jill, remember? But you would take an over-sized pair of jeans — maybe some of your husband’s old jeans — anyway, you cut the seams out of the inside part, so it all lays flat. So there isn’t any legs. Anyway, you can sew a panel in there and you have a skirt. Also if you have bib overalls that the top is good but the bottom is full of holes? Just cut the bib part off the jeans and sew a skirt at the bottom. I have a dress like that and I love it.

And you can make a lot of cute things with bandannas. Just hand sew them together and make a tablecloth and use the bandannas for cloth napkins to go with it. Practice sewing buttons on by sewing some cute ones on the napkins.

The 70s Hippy Housewives

Well, the children will soon be here so I should wrap this writing up.

But I learned most of my housewifery in the 70s and, oh, that was a bang up good time. We were sorta rebelling against the stuffy 50s uptight materialism goin’ on in that era. So we became free spirits of the Hippy 70s. It was the Jesus revolution and some of us were Jesus Freaks. Flower children who were nothing if they were not free thinkers. And all of these ideas came into our homemaking.

My own mother could have killed me for the way I did my curtains. Well, come to think of it, she still could kill me for not measuring my curtains. “If I buy you new curtains, will you put ‘em up right?” she told me just about a week ago. Well, heck, the Hippies just put anything up for curtains. A dish towel or a flowered old fashioned tablecloth. They were back to the landers who decorated with canning jars. I hated Tupperware then and I still do and I put everything in glass jars.

Tony, Jill’s son, is 32 and loved his childhood days when his mom was a Hippy Housewife. He remembers her hanging clothes on the line and she wore her long flowered skirts. He says he won’t marry a girl until he finds a girl like his mom was. Tony would pray for his mom in later years to get her long hair back and be like a hippy again.

There was a real godliness about those housewives in that era. Many wore the long skirts and the bandannas on their heads. Actually, they are in style now, too. Christian Joy tells me the 70s style is in! In NYC, you can’t hardly find any 70s things in the second hand stores, as they are all taken. When Chrissy was here, she bought up a lot of Hippy things here to take back to friends. Chrissy loved the Hippy way I dressed, too, when she was growing up. We always go to the Salvation Army when she comes to town. The daughter in laws, too, will go with us. And Chrissy said the last time we went, “Mom, I love you in the long skirts and boots and shawl around your shoulders.”

Of course, about anything goes, as far as style, now days. So you may as well wear what ya like. Folks who need a certain label on their clothes to feel important, I think, are pretty shallow in their thinking. Some of my kids have to have a label but they get good and laughed at by Dan and Chrissy.

Well, I better hit the road — the children are coming.

Love,
Connie

Dear Mothers,

Jill R. on the letters group came to visit yesterday. I loved our visit. What fun! The whole thing was a riot. Before Jill got here, I had to walk Olivia, age 4, to preschool. When I got home I had to go to the store. My house was a mess but I had to go to the store before Olivia got out of preschool. Anyway, when I got home, I ate lunch and had to rest. I was so tired. As I laid on my couch to rest, I could hear cars outside and I thought, “Oh, dear Jesus, my house is in shambles. Anyone who stops here will think I never do any work.” I had Baby Rose the night before until 8:30 and, oh, my carpet was needing to be vacuumed in the worst way. And then I actually hear someone come upon my porch. I froze in panic. Thank God, it was Jill and not someone I hardly knew.

Then last night, the mother of Baby Olivia, 5 weeks old, asked me to babysit this morning at 5:30 A.M. I was too tired last night to clean much and so got up at 3:00 this morning and cleaned the house and then went back to bed. Ta Da!

But, anyway, Jill and I had a great visit. I bore my heart to Jill about Mary and she said what she always says, “Oh, Connie, it isn’t anything. She will be alright.” Jill really encouraged me. I value her words. She had raised Tony, her son now 32, very close to the hearth, too, as I did Mary. And she said he fell away, too, but came back on his own and to his mother’s teachings. Not because Jill said so. But he made that choice and it was his own decision to believe her teachings. Does that make sense? But now he believes right. The Lord has protected him and kept him. And I pray the Lord is keeping Mary. And, like Jill and I both said, “We wouldn’t have chosen the life we lived, not in a million years.” But our husbands deserted us and we just responded the way God led us. And He really kept us both. And He will keep our children.

Jill looked out my side screen door that I write so much about. I said, “Doesn’t it look so old-fashioned out there?” And Jill said that what makes it so pretty is looking through the screen at the yard. This door is very old and painted black. And I have dried flowers in it. But I thought about what she said about the yard looking old-fashioned through the screen. I thought of the lady preachers I write about and how we have to look at them through the eyes of feminism. Or through a door that is worldly and not pretty with dried flowers in the old screen.

Jill brought me Country Mother presents as she always does. She brought me a sack of the most beautiful rosy red apples from off of her tree. (Jill, did you spray your apple tree?) Those apples have nary a mark on them and they were big, too. Mine from my tree are a lot smaller. I had prayed for tomatoes yesterday morning and Jill brought me some, along with some lovely long, narrow eggplant. (Do I slice that lengthwise, Jill, and fry it?) I have my own tomatoes and have used up the first crop of them and now I have a lot of green ones. But the ones Jill brought will tide me over. Thanks, Jill. Oh, and a big red pepper.

Also Jill made a lovely jar of pickled vegetables. Zucchini is sliced pencil thin at the bottom of the jar and then small tomatoes at the top. Herbs, too. Also she gave me a cute old-fashioned bottle of sage vinegar that she made. In the apple bag was a pumpkin candle — my favorite! Also she gave me some cake and a dozen of her chickens’ eggs. Oh, they are lovely and light brown. She opened the box and showed me that she left one egg dirty so that I would get a farm feeling about the whole thing. Only she and I understand that one. We both love the country things. And what is cute is that she puts old-fashioned country stickers on the brown paper bag of apples.

Jill brought soda pop and I got out the potato chips, as this is traditional. I also got out some of the cordial for her to try. Every time I get this out she says, “Now how do you make this?”

Country Mothers

But ya know back in the old days, Jill and Dixie and I would get together to pray. Heck, none of us had a pot to pee in or a window to throw it out of. Just kidding, but I am saying we were poor ya know? We were each raising a family.

Jill lived in an apartment but her backyard was big and she planted trees and a huge garden. She canned and harvested food all winter.

Dixie had a small farm and, oh, she had two canners going each day in the summer. She had grapes and made grape jam and she tried to peel every apple on her big apple tree. She made pie filling for winter apple pies. She froze them in a bag with flour, sugar and spices. Often she gave me a few bags. When Dixie’s apple tree got cut down by the landlord, Dixie was broken hearted. Dixie had a huge garden, too. Her root cellar was a sight to behold with all of the jars of corn and green beans and tomatoes. Many jars of pickles, both dill and sweet bread and butter pickles. When Jill and I would come, she would dig out the soda pop she had hid from Emily. Dixie was sure to let us know that she never touched the stuff. To her, it was a strong drink. She was a mighty woman of God. (Jill write something about Dixie if the Lord leads you.)

I think knowing her as I did and knowing how powerful she was in Jesus? Well, she just taught me the discerning of spirits by her life. And Jill does, too.

These women are mighty for God and are the best homemakers you could imagine. I have to tell you the truth. I am never deceived by lady preachers. I like some of what they say. But ya know most of us have never seen powerful homemakers for God. I mean if you know the wisdom of God as explained in Proverbs 1-8, then you can make it in your family. I mean us girls had almost no money to deal with to buy groceries. But our families never went hungry.

And all three of us grew the big sunflowers to feed the birds. Jill still grows the most huge heads of sunflowers that I have ever seen. You can take those heads and nail them to the tree for the birds for the winter. I mean just leave the seeds in them. We all love birds.

But ya know when we girls would get together, we would just say things like “I am not afraid to go without. I can make what I need. God will help me.” Dixie would look at us with eyes of discernment and say, “Connie, do you need potatoes?” And I would say, “No, I am OK. I am not going to take your potatoes.” And Dixie would say, “Quit embarrassing me.” Then she would start sacking stuff up out of her own cupboards for me and Jill. Dixie was a giver as Jill is, too. Jill would give you her last 2 bucks in a heartbeat if she thought you needed it. But I am trying to show you Jill and Dixie and how they have lived as homemakers in the power and the anointing of the Holy Spirit.

Yesterday when Jill first came in the door, she was telling me some meals she had made out of her garden. One was that she cooked a cut up chicken breast and put it in a huge skillet with a bit of oil. Then she cut up loads of her garden produce and heaped the skillet with veggies. Probably zucchini, onions, eggplant, tomatoes, peppers, etc. — probably herbs, too. Her husband said it was a meal fit for a king.

Baby is crying. I will have to go.

Love,
Connie