Sunday, December 17, 2017

My Friend Joy

Well, I got my Baby David yesterday and he is such a blessing. Later I want to write more about him. He will be here in an hour and I want to write something else that is on my heart. I wanted to tell you about my friend “Joy.” That isn’t her real name but I didn’t want to use her real name.

Joy came to visit on Sunday. She is my age and we were good friends in the 70’s. Then we lost track of each other. Anyway, her husband was a bad alcoholic in the 70’s. They divorced for years and then, after he was healed, they remarried. Anyway, she worked outside the home for those years of separation. But most of the time in their marriage, she was a stay at home mom of two beautiful children.

Joy and her husband, who is now 67, are very wealthy. Together they accumulated a lot of wealth. She loves to come to see me and I don’t know why. She speaks of things so foreign to me. About women who are so rich and how it gets them in trouble. I mean, she shows me a whole new world I have never even known existed.

She always got such a kick out of Jim. She said, “Connie, remember that day I was here and you were going to tell me about the murderer Jim invited to dinner? Well, Jim stopped you. Would you tell it to me?” Well, I told her and, I tell you, she laughed so hard she almost fell off my pitiful couch. She was sliding off, anyway, as the ccushions are so limp at the edge and fat at the back.

So, as we got more serious, I asked her, “If something happened to your husband, would you remarry?” Boy, she let me know right now, “No, I wouldn’t!” She said, “Ya know, Connie, my husband and I have worked hard for what we have. We went through a hard marriage and the Lord took us through. Also together we have stored up an inheritance for our children.” She went on, “I am not going to go out and blow my husband’s money after he dies or waste it on another marriage and on another man’s children. My husband has worked hard and still works at 67 years old. I would not take his money and squander it and leave his children with no inheritance.” Then she told me about so many rich friends she had who just went nuts when they lost their mates. They made fools of themselves because they couldn’t hold their own.

Last night on the phone, my friend Ruth was telling me that she had seen folks get old and just forget all of their convictions they had when they were young. And they just go crazy and do whatever they want. They get tired and give up. Oh, may the Lord save me from all of that.

This being a widow is so new to me. I had never thought of what I would do if Jim died. But it seems the Lord sends me messengers to tell me nuggets of golden truth.

Joy’s Visit

Another thing my friend Joy said was this. She said, “Connie, remember when MaryL and I were here and we were visiting with you and Jim? And Jim said that he hoped he died first as he could never live without you?” Oh, I began to cry when she said that. But, oh, I am so happy that Jim died first because I know he would grieve so for me.

I can relate better to people than my Jim could. I am so happy that I can bear this sorrow and that my darling doesn’t have to. He was never a moment without me, even as he died. I was there for his last breath. Thank God he never had to feel the emptiness that I feel, the loss of my mate. Oh, I thank God that I can bear this sorrow for him. I praise God I can live these final years alone and Jim doesn’t have to know this sorrow. Thank God.

And, ya know, another friend of mine was telling me, “Well, when do men quit wanting all of this sex stuff? When do they grow old enough to stop wanting it?” And, ya know, I said, “Be glad a man wants you and is attracted to you.” And I mean the act of coming together in marriage is a holy union. We women get so caught up in what other women think of us. But we are called to satisfy our husbands, not other women. I have noticed that the women who are all so popular with other women are not usually good helpmates. I refuse to start running to women’s meetings and all of this. I don’t want the applause of women. “Give not thy strength to women nor thy ways that destroy kings.”

My friends come here to visit and this is where I feel comfortable. I want to just respect Jim’s memory. As to how to do that, I am not always certain. But the Lord sends friends with nuggets of golden truth and I am thankful for that.

Well, Baby David is almost here. He is a month old. As I happily hold him, Papa smiles down at me from Heaven. I can hear Papa tell God, “My wife is never happier then when she has a baby in her arms.” Baby is such a blessing to me. He is such a good baby and is not work at all. His mom and dad are wonderful parents. His mother called twice yesterday to see how he was. And she phoned the Dad and told him all was well. Baby is their treasure and mine, too.

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