Dear Mothers,

Yesterday afternoon, MaryL picked me up and we went to a meeting at this lovely country home out on an acreage. This missionary was there from Africa. Her name is Florence and she is 86 years old. It was not a meeting called together for doctrine as their purpose. But it was full of ladies of faith. Anyway, I didn’t catch all that Florence said. She does good with English but I just didn’t catch it all. So I didn’t want to write about her this morning but the Lord said to, so here I am. I wish I had taped her stories of faith. I will tell you some miracles she told.

When she was a young wife, soldiers had shot her 6 year old daughter. The doctors gave up on the child and said she would die, anyway. Florence prayed and wouldn’t give up. She went before the Lord and prayed for like 8 hours, I think — something like that. She told the Lord that she would not eat or sleep until the child was healed and God healed her child.

Florence is a woman of prayer, for sure. I didn’t even know I was going to this meeting yesterday morning but it all fell into place for me to go. As I had prayed yesterday morning for my own family, I could hear in my spirit Florence’s voice. I had never heard her voice before. But I could hear her praying. When I heard Florence’s voice the next day, I recognized her voice. I told Florence I heard her praying at 6:00 in the morning and she said, “Yes, that was me.” I can sense her prayers now as I write.

She told many stories of faith and how the Lord kept her safe from soldiers who were after her to kill her. She is a widow and her husband died, I think, about 20 years ago.

She told one story of how she was visiting her daughter at her daughter’s home. Anyway, Florence was praying in the morning. And she said to the Lord, “Lord, when I die, I want to die like this. I want to get up in the morning and pray, and then clean up my home, and then take a nice bath, and then lay down quietly and just pass away with You, Lord.” Well, that morning at her daughter’s house, she did all of those things and then she laid down to take a little nap and, lo and behold, the Lord took Florence home to heaven. She died. So her daughter comes in and tries to wake her and she couldn’t, and her daughter called 911 and the police came and the ambulance. She got to the hospital and had no heartbeat or pulse. She was dead for at least an hour. Then she came back to life, as normal as ever. The doctors kept calling her after she went home to see if she was still alive. Because the doctors knew for sure that she had died.

Well, while she was dead on earth, she was alive in heaven. She was in heaven with the Lord. She said she saw heaven and a very narrow road that led to heaven. She didn’t see a light or a tunnel but she saw a very narrow narrow road that led to heaven. It was so peaceful and happy there and she talked with God. And after she talked with the Lord, the Lord told her to go back to her body. And she went back to earth and she went back into her body and she woke up at the hospital.

She told other stories, too, about her sister. Her sister was praying and the Lord told her that she would die in a few days. So the sister just got everything ready and told all of her relatives “Good-Bye” and then she died in that few days. Just like that! When she first told her children she was going, they began to cry and all. Her kids were older and grown. But the sister was very matter of fact about it and died, anyway, right on schedule. Well, Jim did it all like that, too, but I wouldn’t have it.

Anyway, Florence told many stories of faith. A lot about running from soldiers and hiding from them. And how the Lord kept her hidden in Him.

At the end of the message, she said again and again that Jesus spoke to her that He is coming soon and to be ready for His second coming.

There was also a woman there that her husband had died, and her son, 8 years ago.

Florence, at 86, was fresh manna to me. Cutting edge, bread of life teachings that touched my heart. As she spoke, I could hear her with spiritual ears. Anyway, at the end of the meeting, I had asked for prayer. Florence said, “Connie, Jesus is coming soon and you will see your Jim in heaven soon.” She said it like she knew it and that so touched my heart.

Later, we all sat at this lovely table and had iced tea and donuts. I gave some of my testimony and MaryL, age 77, told about my email group. The lady of the house, Eva, had read a lot of my writings and I hadn’t seen her in probably 30 years. I guess Mary had given them to her.

Mary L was at her best yesterday. She is a pistol packin’ Mama. If you go anywhere with her, you could end up any place. So you put me in the pot, too — or her and just me together — you could come up with anything.

So we are on the way to the meeting in another town. We were early and so we stopped at this big garage. I was thinking, “Why are we going here?” Well, it was like a place out of nowhere. If we went back there today and it wasn’t there, I wouldn’t be surprised. It was a really old place and it had a little restaurant there. So we got a bit of lunch. This place looked like a place that was an original “Hole in the Wall.” It looked like a place where the angels abode and they saw us coming and they said to each other, “Look natural.” Of course, anywhere you go with Mary, this could happen.

Anyway, so Mary tells me — as she eats this hot dog and I am eating a piece of pie with French fries — she says matter of fact, “Well, Connie, you can have Russ (her husband) after I die. You are the only one I would pick for him as you understand him. Most women wouldn’t understand him like you would … they would just fight with him.” I about died laughin’. Mary says, as I am crackin’ up, “Well, I wouldn’t just give him to anyone!” Then I said, “Well, heck no! What are friends for?” (Just kidding.) I am thinkin’ in my heart, “Poor Russ, he would murder me. I am an accident going some place.”

Russ and Mary think I will remarry but I never will. I saw this guy walkin’ down the street last week. I thought he was sorta handsome, but, man, did he look like a warrior! It’s in my blood to pick out a Hells Angel and try to convert him. It’s just in my blood. But I am too old for that stuff.

Mary said, “Connie, just pick someone out that matches your spirit.” But I said I would have to have some attraction to him. And I just haven’t seen any man I am attracted to. I thought Jim was handsome and sexy and I would never be attracted to anyone else.

I told Mary, I said, “Ya know, I can hardly eat or do the normal things.” I mean I have good and bad days. I am getting better and more able to hold my own. But if I can just be quiet and sew and cook and clean, I will be happy. My life has been one explosion to the next and I am TIRED! I am very tired. I am so spiritually tired of fighting and holding my own in a land that is full of sin and corruption. I can relate to Florence who lived in a war torn world. I get that!

I miss Wild Man. Oh, yes, I do. But to get back on that horse and ride again? Um, I think I will just leave well enough alone. I have had a happy life this past 26 years. I have no regrets! And for me now to live in the shadow of those years is fine with me. My light is gone out of my marriage and I feel set aside. I am a helper now to let my grown kids have some light and I will help them. I want them to know the Joy I knew in marriage. They are young and I want to them to experience the contentment and happiness I had. I don’t want them to worry about me. I want them to know that I am a faithful mother and I am here tending the home as I always have. I just want to be quiet and happy and work with my hands in my home.

Love,
Connie

Good Morning Mothers,

Just talked to Christian Joy on the phone this morning. I told her about my writings of yesterday. I asked her if she remembered going to the library on a summer morning and then coming home to nap in front of the fan on a bedsheet on the floor. She remembered it and these were some of the happy memories of her childhood.

Another thing I did with her and John is this. If I had to take the bus some place, I would pack them a lunch box. I would fix a little thermos jug of milk for them, and a sandwich and cookies. Often Jim was at work and we didn’t have a car, so I had to take a bus to do errands with the children. They loved riding the bus. We didn’t have much money but in the summertime, I always made sure they had some little toys to play with. I would get them sunglasses and maybe a whistle to put on a string around their necks. They loved blowing the plastic whistles and wearing the sunglasses. Imagine how cute they were on the bus with sunglasses quietly eating their lunch. Oh, they were so cute and I was so proud of them.

Christian Joy was just 14 months older than Johnny. I didn’t have a lot of clothes for them but always kept them clean and nice. They looked like twins as they got to be 3 and 4 years old.

Chrissy tells me that folks think her name isn’t really Christian Joy and that she just uses this name for labels. People will say, “Well, supposedly her name is Christian Joy.” Then they want to know her REAL name. Well, that is her real name. The Lord told me at a really hard time in my life that I would see a Joy in my Christian walk. And so the Lord told me to name my baby girl “Christian Joy.” I tacked an “E” at the end of Christiane but the Lord wasn’t happy about that. And it’s been a confusion ever since. I used to call Chrissy “Joy Bells” as she is often full of JOY. When she was little, we called her “Christian Joy Bells” or “Sissy Joy Bells.”

She told me this morning that she got to buy an industrial sewing machine, a second hand one for 100 bucks. She has a nice sewing machine but it’s hard to do some things on it. So this is a huge machine she just got … it’s llke one that would be used in a factory. She bought it from someone a few blocks from her. She couldn’t get it home so Jason and a friend put it on skateboards and rolled it to Christian’s apartment. Sounds like home! Anyway, it is a huge machine with a table that is about 5 feet long and 4 feet wide.

Speaking of sewing … See, when the children were young, I would sew things up all the time. If their sunglasses broke? Like the ear piece would come off because the screws would come loose? I would take a needle and thread and sew the ear piece back on through the screw holes. If anything could be sewed, I would sew it. I would sew a basket back together if it broke. Or if the furniture got a hole in it, I would sew it back together. Even the boys would sew things back together again. Dan still comes in the house and looks for a needle and thread to repair his shoes or whatever.

Most of the kids had their own button collection when they were young. I had an old bottle I had gotten at a sale lately. I filled it with old buttons and put a piece of brown paper sack over it for a lid with a brown string tied on. Dan saw it about a year ago and said, “Oh, Mom, that is neat.”

Dan always reminded me of a little tailor when he was a child. John and David, I think, were the only ones of my kids who didn’t sew much. That was because John couldn’t light firecrackers and sew at the same time, and David was quietly drawing pictures.

Love,
Connie

Dear Kitchen Saints,

Oh, wow, it’s summertime and the livin’ is easy.

This morning as I prayed, the Lord set before me life and death. He said I could either be happy or sad today. The choice is mine. I could either lay Mary and Brandon on the altar as Abe did or I could make gods of them. Isaac was chosen of God to do great things. He wasn’t a son Abe wanted to spare. He was the son of promise. Abe and Sarah had walked by faith to receive Isaac. Laying Isaac upon an altar was the hardest thing in this world for Abe to do. But it was a test for Abraham and he passed and God sent Abe another sacrifice.

So many of us as homeschooling mothers have given our all to our children and they are not easy to give back to God. But we must give them back to Him as He knows how to take care of our family Jewels. He won’t let us down if we have faith in HIM.

He will set before us life and death. Heaven or Hell — faith or fear. This day, what will we choose. Whom will we serve today? God or Satan? If fear and confusion is first place in our hearts (our minds) then we are serving Satan and making a god of him. But if we choose to serve God in our temples (our minds) then He will rule and reign in our lives.

The kids that give us the most trouble, we pray over the most and they end up being the greatest of blessings. I have told you many times of my beloved son John’s testimony. Lately, as I prayed with Nancy she said, “Had Jim been here, this wouldn’t have happened with Mary and Brandon.” I had told John this. And he said, “Mom, I don’t have the fire Dad had. But I am a full grown man and I will take care of my sister Betsy (Mary Elisabeth).” Imagine the worry that took off of my shoulders.

Mary is hiding out from Brandon. I am prayin’ he will find her. He is a good hunting dog, and a loving Shepard. I know that. I don’t know where she is, either, but have her cell phone number. But can you imagine how much I don’t need this? This is enough for Jim to storm out of heaven and come back to life.

But ya know, God tells me this. “No woman when she warreth entangles herself with the cares of this world.” I am here to do a great work for the Lord. I don’t know if I will get it done or not. But it is a fight of faith. I am used to fighting in faith. We plant faith seeds and then we allow them to be aborted. Our seeds of faith have to be left in the ground. They have to be watered and prayed over. What digs them up? Mark 4 says it is the pride of life the lust of the flesh (worry) and the deceitfulness of riches.

Will we choose this day worry over faith in God? Will we look at our homes and say, “There are giants in the land too big for me to handle.” Or will we say, “Yes, there are giants in the land but we can get through them with the help and grace of our almighty God.” Will we be faithful Mothers or will we fall near the end of the race and not get back up?

Jim and I had prayed so much over Mary and Brandon. Brandon had asked Jim’s permission to court Mary and Jim gave his permisision. Brandon had a good job and was a steady worker. And when Jim died, Brandon didn’t work again. By the way, the Lord healed Brandon of the Chrones. Either that or he is in remission. He was a rack of bones and I had to look away from him and say to God, “If he lives, he lives and if he dies, he dies.” And he lived. No one knows how. But he seems to be fine. Gained weight and looks healthy. But I stand on the scripture “What God has joined together let no man separate.” Mary and Brandon were joined by God, and no man can separate them. I didn’t raise Mary fuel for Hell and didn’t, with Jim, give her to a man who won’t be a good husband to her.

I stand alone on God’s word. He hasn’t let me down yet and I know He won’t. He is on my side. When Satan comes in as a flood, the Lord will raise up a standard against him. I know a standard is here and I expect many miracles.

Suffering Saints

Yesterday I went to the store and, oh, the angels were everywhere around me. I could feel them watching me. Their eyes were upon me. As I went to pull into my driveway, a dove sat right in front of the car and wouldn’t move. I was half in and half out of the driveway. I finally got the car in as I prayed.

The Lord will hover over a broken and contrite heart. He broods over many of you who fight back tears to read this writing. He is near to you and knows your heart. But I can say truly, “It is well with my soul. Yes, His grace is sufficient for me. I am not afraid of what man will do unto me. I am not moved by what I see but only what I believe.”

I was a faithful mother. I didn’t plant seeds of adultery and fear into my home. I planted the seeds of Godliness. I am not going to dig around in an unfaithful mother’s garden and try to get food. I will reach into my own secret garden of faithfulness and eat of the Bread of LIFE.

Mothers, don’t let the devil tell you that your prayers were for nothing. If you have long suffering and patience, you will see the devil eat dung. You will see God’s hand move and He will answer every prayer you have prayed. He holds our prayers in golden viles. He counts our tears. He is touched by our grief and He has carried it for us. He will answer our prayers for His own sake. He walks with us and wants to be glorified. We are not lost street children. We are Mothers in Israel. He knows what it means to weep over His own rebellious children. But He never gave up. His Father’s heart was long suffering to those He loved.

And ya know, while the church is hoopin’ and hollerin’ and havin’ a good time, the remnant cries out for some real answers. If you are broken hearted today, dear kitchen saint, rejoice. Your redemption draws nigh. I am beleiving God for many miracles today. Not just for my own family but for all of you and your homes.

Mothers, ya know? When we are in such a dire place, it is good? We have nothing to hold onto except His Presence. And, oh, He makes a lighted path before us. He has made one for me. Let me tell you about it in the next email.

Love,
Connie

PS As I was reading this and getting ready to send it, the Lord said to me, “You won’t give up on this, as you never have, and you will see Victory as always.” I laughed real loud at the devil. I bet the neighbors heard me through this open screen door. Good Grief. But the Lord told me, “You are still a tough old dog and you will chew on this until you see MY glory.” Yes, Satan is building me another testimony. Whose laughin’ now, devil?

Lazy Days of Summer

Oh, as children, we kids loved the summertime. Getting to go barefoot and playing in the garden hose. On the weekends, we went on picnics and went swimmin’ in the lake. Our family went to Minnesota and swam in Leach Lake. Then we would be all day pickin’ leaches off of our bodies. (Are you reading this, Julie? Now you know why I am not afraid of bugs.) But we loved the hot summer days.

Later on in the season, I would go stay with my aunt on her farm. The mornings would be busy with housework, etc. Then in the afternoon, my aunt and gram would watch TV and snap beans to can. It would be too hot to do much work, and I only remember a few fans. And ya know, the farm families ate with the season. If the garden beans were ready, then we ate beans every day with a meal. When the tomatoes came on and the mothers were canning them, we ate tomatoes with each meal. Then corn on the cob and we ate that until fall. We never tired of these vegetables because we didn’t eat them fresh in the winter. But the cucumbers were so good. One recipe for them is very simple and what we all ate growin’ up. Just slice your cukes in a bowl and put in about a cup of water. Then put in about a fourth cup of vinegar and about fourth cup of sugar. A pinch of salt and some black pepper. Now we mixed these cukes up with an equal amount of sliced onions and green peppers — the longer they sit in the fridge in all of this mixture, the better they get. And then the housewives just kept adding more vegetables to the bowl as they continued to set them on the table for each meal. We ate those all summer.

When my children were little, we would hurry about and get the house cleaned up if we knew it was gonna be hot. Then, right after lunch, I would walk my children to the library. When we came home, I would put a clean sheet on the floor and they could spread their books out and have plenty of room. Then I would fix a box fan right in front of them so they would be cool. I would get out their bed pillows and they would rest and read for the afternoon. I loved those lazy, quiet days of napping with the childrn next to the fan. I would read, too, on the couch.

One thing I enjoyed, too, was making things for the refrigerator for the hot days. I would make a lot of Jello. The Lord is telling me today to do this again and to make a nice cool summer home. It is His grace to me — it is His faith idea for me and I can’t wait to do all of this. To have macaroni salad and some cold canned fruit in bowls to eat for lunch is fun. It’s nice to pull out homey things to eat with cold sandwiches. To have a jug of cold ice tea ready made in the fridge is what I grew up with.

Often the Mothers would sew in the afternoons when it was very hot. To sit and do handsewing, patching or knitting. My mom and aunt would make doll clothes with me. Then, about 2:30 or so in the afternoon, they would start picking up their sewing and putting things away for my dad to get home. Mom would have iced tea or something cold for Dad to drink and, of course, supper was always at 5:00.

Then the evening was family time. Visiting with the family or with neighbors and friends. The evenings would be so hot and we would all sit on the porch until the evening cooled off and then we went to bed. We had barely any fans. But the Lord has given me such JOY today as I think of the Old Fashioned summers. I have a window air conditioner now. But I have to work to keep this house cool.

Baby David will be here this morning. PTL. I am so happy that I get to help with Baby David who is only 7 weeks old.

Papa’s presence is always with me. It used to be that he had to wait for me to get done on the email. Now I write to him first and then I write to you all. I write to him in heaven on just plain paper. I know the Lord gives him my words.

The utter sweetness that is in this house is so worth keeping. Lord God, please keep me as I keep house.

Ladies, please pray for Mary and Brandon. They are separated and need to get back together. They need to comfort each other. Both are so upset and just lost their baby only 8 months ago and now Mary’s Dad in April. Brandon can’t work because of depression. Please pray for them.

Dear Housewives,

Oh, mercy! In the mornings when I start my day, I ask the Lord what to write about. If I am fresh out of ideas, all I have to do is watch Christian TV for about 5 minutes and my blood is boiling. What does get me goin’, though, is this. The world news is saying the same on one point as some on the Christian TV and that is about preparing for bad weather. That seems to be a warning across the board. That I am taking seriously. But one Christian show was on yesterday and this woman was on there talking about wife abuse. She wrote a book. It seems wife abuse these days can be just about anything. If your husband insults your cooking, then that is verbal abuse and you should walk out on him, even in the Christian circles. This is like someone pounding a post into my heart with a hammer.

This morning, a Christian show was on about finding another mate after you have been divorced. I wonder how the church can say some of this stuff with a straight face. This show this morning was talking about being crushed from divorce to start with, and then going out to find another mate who has gone through the same thing. And this wasn’t good to find someone else like yourself. Well, no, duh. But they still are for all of us who are single to run out and find someone. But ya know, what kind of a Christian man is out looking for a divorced, emotionally wrecked woman to rescue?

A Christian woman of dignity and honor isn’t going to be out there in the street waiting for Mr. Right to come pick her up. The virtuous woman is whole in herself and waits upon God to rescue her and be her Husband. Then if God sends her a husband after that, then fine. But the truth of the Bible is that if a woman is a believer, she shouldn’t leave her unbelieveing husband if he is pleased to dwell with her. But if he leaves, let him go as we are called to peace. But the Bible doesn’t say that you as a believeing wife are free to remarry. If you want to remarry, then remarry your husband.

The Bible says that we are called to peace. See, when Jim and I were separated, I didn’t want to go through life without a husband. I didn’t want Jim at the time. But I would not disobey God’s Word and go look for another man. It’s clear in the Word that we are to be married for life. It is clear that the Christian wife is to lead her husband to Christ through her holy behavior. Some of these horror stories on TV these women tell are horrid. But I can say clearly that I went through all of what they did and more. And I didn’t have to sin. I didn’t have to go against God’s Word in order to keep food on my table for my children or to keep myself safe. I was a true believer in Christ.

See, God knew my heart and knew that I wanted to please him. I was young and wanted a man to love and care for me. My heart was so broken by Jim at times that I could barley breathe. I didn’t eat for days, as I couldn’t eat, my nerves were so bad. But I would not sin against God.

Many times the winds of temptation came over me. But God would make circumstances happen as to rescue me. I didn’t have the will power at times to do right. And if it wasn’t for His unseen hand to rescue me, I would have failed Him. One time, an old boyfriend came to my house while Jim had been missing for a few months. I had really liked this guy, and was sort dipping in my walk with the Lord as I was young. But the Lord sent a dear Christian girlfriend to the house at the same time. Ray kept trying to get my friend Janet to leave. And she did leave and he did, too. Then he came back, saying he had left his keys at my house. I was about 23 years old. But the Lord had spoken to Janet to come back, too, and she did. And she stood with me until Ray left and didn’t come back. The devil had a plan for me that day. Jim had been missing for a few months and came back that afternoon to my great surprise. He would have found me with Ray.

His Word Is Our Truth

See, I loved the Lord, even as a young Christian mother. I came to Jesus when I was 19 years old. I had a horrible life before that. To find Jesus was the greatest happiness I had ever known. Oh, I loved Jesus with all of my heart. But ya know, I was young and wanted things to be right with my husband. And I had a horrid marriage! But I sensed a greater vision in my heart. As a young deserted wife with a child to raise, I sensed something greater would come out of all of that, many years later. I knew I would write books. Even at that time in my life, I sensed so much deception in the churches.

When I found out about submission, I was about 25. I wanted to make out fliers and hand them to the women at the Baptist Church. Because at the time, many of the women had never heard of such a thing.

I always felt like the last straw at church because, back then, divorce wasn’t rampant like it is today. At our church, I was the only one separated from my husband. This was in the late 60s.

I studied my Bible all the time and was always asking the Pastor questions at Bible study. He didn’t know what think of me. I was usually the foolishness that confounded the wise. I was very innocent and didn’t mean to upset whole churches but did manage to do so. And, oh, some people couldn’t wait until I left. But I had a vision that someday I would be a teacher and writer and I just wanted to make sure that in my temptations and trials, I did not sin against God.

Yes, my trials were hard. Rock Hard. But my heart’s desire was to be effective in my life for Jesus Christ. I could see, even as a young Baptist mother, that a lot of hogwash was being preached. I didn’t want to feed the sheep more garage. I wanted to give the sheep the truth of His Word.

Often, as a young Christian mom, I would become bitter and hateful towards God. How often I thought He had forsaken me. Oh, I would curse God and dare Him to make me die. I couldn’t help it. I was so all alone and felt so forsaken. My heart ached — my whole body ached with depression. But I would see a Christian mother who was down and my heart would go out to her. And I would say to God, “Lord, forgive me for my sins so that I can minister peace to this dear Sister in Christ.”

How many times, out of my brokenness and dispair, my heart went out to hurting souls. I knew I couldn’t heal their souls, especially when I was in sin. So out of my despair, I would repent of my sins so that God could use me to bring peace and the message of Salvation to a hurting lost soul. I didn’t live a holy life on my own. No, I didn’t. But I loved God more than my marriage. I wanted His truth above the world’s. I allowed God to make me into a new creature through many trials of my faith. Often, Christ spoke to me in my tantrums. “Connie, be still and know that I am God.” My point is that all I did was obey God.

The truth of His Word is so much easier to follow than this warmed over half baked goulash you have as Christian teaching of the day. And God Bless the local church. They do a lot of good works and the poor need to be fed and clothed. The church of today plays a part, yes. But Bible truth is no longer taught in most churches of today. So if you have to go to church out of obedience to your husband, then go. But at home, search the scriptures on your own and follow the truth on marriage and the family.

I have many church friends and I love them and they love me. At Jim’s Memorial, so many church friends were so precious to me. They have wept with me and walked with me and they are so dear to me.

His Way or the Highway

And mercy sakes alive! When I first got saved? I would stand with a beer in one hand and a cig in the other hand and preach the Gospel at he same time. (Ain’t ya proud of me.) And I cussed, too, and used the Lord’s name in vain. I forgot about that! Well, tell it all, Connie. I had hot pants on and high heels. OK, I said it. Bright blond hair, too. But God saw something in me, I guess, worth keepin’.

Right after I got saved, I worked in an office and got mad at this lady and threw her around the room and tore up the whole office. I was a maniac. But God kept me. I loved to street fight.

Once I got saved, it was like trying to stop a locomotive with a bike. I did really love the Lord. I wanted to be good but it wasn’t easy for me to do. I would stop smoking and drinking and then do something worse. My first Mother’s Day after being saved, for about 2 months, I had to go to jail. Oh, I cried and cried and thought God would never get me under control. I loved the Lord so much but was such a hellion.

I had worshiped the devil just before I got saved. So he didn’t want to let me go? I mean no one I knew of at the time worshiped the devil. No books had been written about it at the time. THANK GOD I DIDN’T WRITE ONE. But I knew Satan as a supernatural god. So when I met Christ and knew Him as the greater power, I knew Jesus was truly a powerful Lord. I praise the Lord for His overcoming power and anointing. She who had been forgiven much loved much.

And, oh, when Wild Man and I first got married, we fought like dogs. It’s a wonder we lived to tell it. Once he thought he had killed me but I had just fallen asleep, as I was sick and tired of it all. He packed his clothes and went to a neighbor’s and told her to come see if I was dead. I woke up laughing! Mary L says, “Jim had to go through prison to be married to me.”

So. Lest any of you think I was a saint, then, no, not hardly. But I can read! And ya know, if ya want the Lord Jesus Christ, then follow His Word. Walk with the Lord in truth. It’s so much easier than playing religion and tryin’ to walk with one foot in the world and one foot in the church. Don’t play with God and make His Word work for you and your life. It’s His way or the highway. Either you love Him and want to follow Him or you don’t. Choose you this day whom you will serve.

If you are deceived in the matters of family and home, then you are very deceived. God’s Word is built on the foundation of family order that is built upon Jesus the Rock. The church is to be built on family authority and order. Jesus is the Rock and we are to build our house upon the Rock. If we love Him we keep His commandments. You can’t live a life of sin and say you are following Jesus. If you don’t love your husband who you can see, then how can you love God in heaven who you can’t see? Your husband is the teacher God has sent to teach you His ways. Submit to your husband as unto the Lord.

Solid families make up solid churches. Many of today’s churches are made up of single, divorced hooligans that refuse to be under any authority. And that is not the way the church is to be run.

Our homes are to be our colleges as Christian wives and mothers. And one day, you young moms graduate and become the Titus 2 Mother. She comes no other way than through living it out in her own home. I had a dream and vison of this many years ago as a young wife deserted and forsaken. God knows His stuff. If you want Him and you want to go His way, HE will make a way for you.

This Christian life is hard to live. It’s supposed to be hard, Darlin’. If it wasn’t, we would live it on our own and we wouldnt need the Hand of Christ. Then we would be full of ourselves and not full of Him.

Love,
Connie

Dear Mothers,

I have a while to write before Baby David gets here. This morning, as I prayed about what to write, I just felt like, “Oh, Lord, give me a word about homemaking to the mothers out there. They need it so much.”

First a funny story! Dan is living at Christian Joy’s in NYC for a while. Chrissy says, “Mom, Dan’s shoes smell so bad, I can’t hardly take it.” Well, ya know, if you are a punk rocker, it’s cool to stink? Well, so Christian Joy had read where you are supposed to put stinky shoes in the freezer. I said, “Well, Chrissy, won’t they stink again after they are thawed out?” She said, well, she hadn’t thought of that. “And what will it do to the food in the freezer?” I mean, this household tip should be under the heading of “Worst Household Tips for 2006.” Anyway, I can just see Dan trying to hurry to put on his block of ice shoes in the morning and run out to work.

My Mom who is 83 says if she didn’t have funny stories about my kids to laugh about, she would have died sooner. And that recent newsletter that Jen put together is so funny, I can barely stand to read it. It’s so sad, reading what I wrote about Jim, but there are funny stories in there about the kids when they were young, too. Thank God I have a sense of humor — I would die on the vine without it.

Anyway, back to business. Boy, I will tell ya, on the news? Wow, they are talking about the weather being so changed and bad. Now even the government is telling us to be prepared for all kinds of maladies. If the Bird Flu don’t get ya, a tornado or hurricane will.

I think it’s just not enough to tell you to buy extra food to store. You have to have a homemaking spirit to go along with all of this. See, I have faced the food shortages and storing food and all. But where the devil would get me the most is in FEAR. I mean you can have a lot of food but if you are fearful, you won’t cook it, anyway. See, the spirit of homemaking is the spirit of God.

It isn’t enough to say, “Well, I have decided to submit to my husband.” The spirit of submission is the spirit of Christ within you. It’s a spirtual decision to submit to your husband. The Bible says we are to do that, but not in the flesh. It is a spirtual act of obedience. Along with the obedience to the Lord and to our husbands comes the Keeper at Home.

The Bible says we as women are saved in child bearing. This means that through having children, we are saved, and all of the acts of caring for the child and the father to the child. Our spiritual life in our homes is our college of the Spirit that teaches us how to make Jesus our husband and King. We must receive in the Spirit the heart of the virtuous woman. It is not a decision to become her in the physical. The Spirit of wisdom has to come as we beg for more of Jesus in our hearts. He is the teacher of wisdom and homemaking to the married wife in the home.

We are not men and our gifts and callings in the Spirit are not like a man’s calling. We as women are set apart to do a great work for the Lord in the home. See, you can build your home in the wilderness. If the Bird Flu would come to your area, you would have to be quarantined for maybe a month. But, see, if a mother has the Spirit of the Lord concerning homemaking and submission to her husband, then she will be able to make it with her family in peace and rest.

Mother, be wise and discern the times and the seasons. Be as the ants who store their food in the harvest and they have no leader to tell them what to do. They are just wise and, through instinct, they store their food.

It’s more important that you get a spirit of homemaking and submission to your husband than to store food. Call wisdom to your home. Rebuke pride and vanity from your hearts and take on a servant’s spirit. Serve the Lord with gladness as you serve the family. Pray the Lord will protect your homes and the children and your husband. Tend to your spiritual life first.

Homemaking

See, the world is saturated in feminism. A lot of you want a garden but can’t get to it. You condemn yourself for not having a garden. But ya know what? Feminism is an unholy smoke that is invisible. There is so much in the airwaves about feminsm. It is the religion of the hour for women. It stops us dead in our tracks sometimes. Satan is the prince of the power of the air. (Ephesians 2:2) Feminism is in the air we breathe. Unless we want to switch channels to Christ and surround ourselves with Him, then we will live in feminism.

This unholy, ungodly, devilish spirit will take you down, Girlfriend, and your family with you. It is the spirit of vanity and pride. “I don’t have to stay home and clean and do dishes. I will do what I want.” Well, have at it. But you will destroy your home. And we are in dangerous times. While you have time to read and study the word on homemaking, do it. It won’t be a lack of food that will kill some of you. But a lack of the wisdom of God.

It’s not a lazy spirit — it is a demon spirit of fear that takes a lot of you women down. You have to walk by faith. Faith is called a fight in the Bible and it says to “Walk by faith.” So Faith is something you do. It’s an action word. You do faith! So if your family is broken and hopeless, then get up in the morning and walk by faith. Say to yourself, “God is going to give me a miracle today and I am going to prepare my home for a miracle. I will make a garden and I will prepare my home for the coming hard times. I will make a pantry and get my house in order. Because the Lord will answer my prayers.” And see in the spirit of your imagination your husband coming home at 5:00 for supper and walk according to His will.

Make a supper and include a plate at the head of the table for your husband. I did this for many years, even when Jim was missing. The kids would ask questions about it and I would say, “I am believing God for your Dad to be home soon.” My children got used to seeing the plate at the head of the table and knew Mama was full of faith. And Jim was healed by the hand of the almighty God.

We must walk by faith and not sight. This world is not our home. Only faith pleases God. Faith that is active crisp and clean in Mother’s heart. Her visions are strong and bright and ready to act. She doesn’t sit and cry that her husband is gone from the family. She arises and makes a home in the darkness. Christ’s light is a lamp to her feet and light to her pathway. Only His life and light can bring her through.

For some of you, Satan has stacked the deck against you. Well, quit playin’ by his rules of depression and bondage. Arise in God and walk out your faith. You are not lost and forsaken — you are a daughter of God.

Prepare your homes for the coming hard times concerning our economy. I mean hard times are here now. Practice the skills of wisdom and homemaking. First prepare your spirit and make sure you are walking as the virtuous woman of faith. And as Daughters of Sarah who are not afraid. Then prepare your kitchens for cooking and baking. Be wise in the skills of homemaking.

Wise Homemakers

And ya know, this bad economy is a blessing for some of us. At least for the women who are still in the home. Because we should have been cookin’ and bakin’ for the family all along. It shouldn’t take an earthquake for us to make a pie. I used to tell the Lord that I had too much work to do and I didn’t want to do all that cookin’. I thought I had to cook and all because I was so poor. But the Lord would say, “Connie, I am teaching you to be wise.” Good night! Even in a good year without a hurricane, we have enough poisons and all to kill us in our foods, anyway.

I have to get goin’ but I wanted to write some tips that I used for my family of 6 children. I would cook and bake in the mornings while Jim was at work. I wanted to have plenty of time to make what I needed. I would make a bread almost every day. Either it would be a yeast bread, or cornbread, or biscuits, or some kind of a quick bread. I made up the Bisquick Mix using 5 pounds of flour. With this, I could make pancakes or any of the quick breads. White flour isn’t the best for ya. But I would put in extra eggs, fruit, sunflower seeds, and nuts, etc. if I had them on hand, to make it more nutritious. I used a lot of instant dry milk for cooking and baking. I made a lot of soups and stews. I always had rice and dried beans on hand, and oatmeal as it is nice and nutritious and cheap. Canned goods are so cheap at the store and keep well. When you buy your groceries, just pick up as much extra canned goods as you can and rotate it in the cupboard.

And ya know, mostly what our kids and I are going to plant is tomatoes and peppers. Tomatoes and peppers freeze so well. All you do is cut up the tomatoes and put them in plastic bags. You don’t have to cook them. Same with peppers.

Farmers around here sell fresh corn in the summer and it’s cheap, like 3 or 4 bucks a dozen. I just clean my ears of corn and boil it in a pan and then, when it is cool, I cut it off the cob and freeze it. You can then take the cleaned cobs and boil them for a few hours. Then take the cobs out and measure the water. If you have 3 cups of the corn cob water, then put in 3 cups of sugar, bring this to a boil and let it thicken, and you will have a delicious corn syrup. Just use as much sugar as you have leftover water.

Just try to fill your freezers this summer with food as it easy to come by. Then use the frozen foods first in case you have a power outage. Pack the canned stuff away to use later.

Garage sales are full of candles to be bought for a song. But ya know, I just feel I have to share this stuff about preparing for hard times in our world.

Let’s be wise and submit to our own husbands as unto the Lord. Love your husbands and children and don’t forsake the Lord. Be keepers at home and mind your own business. You don’t have to have a lot of fellowship here and there with women. Let your fellowshiip be with your children and husband. Let them be your best friends. Because true fellowship is with the Father God — get alone with Him and let Him run your life under your husband. And in this way, Dear Hearts, you will be the house set on the hill. A light in the darkness for a lost and dying world.

Get the wisdom that can only come from God so that you can give Him to your friends and loved ones. The mothers of today don’t need more of the same teachings — they need a word from the wilderness. They need the fresh manna. They must see the Mother in the home being an example of obedience to the Lord. We women must teach out of our lives of obedience to God, through the meek and quiet spirit.

Love,
Connie

I have a few hours to write this morning. I prayed last night over some things I want to write about this morning.

Ya know, the husband is the head of the home. He is the priest of the Home, whether we say he can be or not. He has certain instincts as a man and a father that God has given him. Oh, yeah, he may smoke a cigarette or drink some beer. But that doesn’t mean he is all bad and can’t discipline the children. Some of you wives think you have to be in charge because you are a Christian and have heard from God. And certainly nothing good could come out of your husband, in a way of any sense, because he used to be on drugs or some such nonsense. Well, see, men are different.

If I hadn’t had Jim to tell me when to come in out of the rain, I wouldn’t even be here today. Jim had a lot of common sense and I was loaded in the Spirit. The cops could be chasin’ Jim and the Lord would tell me to submit to Jim, and I did. We saw many miracles. The devil was always setting me up for something and, because I was submissive, he never got to go through with his plans. I know one time, I kept listening to sermons on the second coming of Christ. I got so upset about it. If I looked out the window and a cloud covered the sun and it got kinda dark all at once in the sky, I thought the Lord had come. One time, I was havin’ a glory fit in the living room and our son Jimmy was about 9 and he grabbed my legs, as he thought the rapture had come and he knew I was going to heaven. Heck, he knew he was too ornery to go on his own, so he wanted a free ride on my legs. I would get myself and my kids so hyped up, it was crazy. One day, Jims says to me, “Connie, the Lord isn’t coming back today.” Well, He didn’t, either. Yes, I still believe in the rapture but I was going crazy and drivin’ my family nuts with it. Thank God I submitted to my husband. I was getting hysterical and Jim, in his authority, took the fear out of it. He believed in the rapture, too.

But, see, we women think that if our family isn’t saved like the church says they are to be saved, then we think they ain’t saved. Religion divides us from our husbands. But the true and living Christ unites us in peace.

Let your husband have the sons in the family. Ya know, if some of you women would get out of the way of your husband’s authority, life would be so simple. If your son is smaller than your husband and the son comes in late, or whatever, let the son answer to his dad. Often the dad won’t say a word, as he don’t want to fight with the mom. But, mothers, just stay out of the way. Give the reins of the home over to your husband. Let him know that you may not agree with him but you know he is the Priest of the home.

See, a lot of children know that Mom is gonna step in because of Dad’s temper or whatever. Well, Mother, why are you afraid of Dad’s temper — the kids should be afraid of the wrath of Dad. We moms want to get all religious about every act of punishment. Heck, those kids don’t care that Mom is theologically correct. Teenagers seem to be driven by a force we can’t handle as mothers. But if they know Dad is gonna turn blue, then they will be less likely to tease the bear and give him trouble. I mean, our kids go right up to a hungry lion and insult him. Then we moms try to rush in and help the kid get away with it. Why? Because Dad didn’t attend chiurch last week. Certainly Dad has no fatherly instincts until he kisses preacher’s butt. And preacher is sometimes worse than Dad, but he hides it better.

I talked to a very dear mother at the store the other day. I tell ya, what a tap dancer. She is a dear heart but wanted me to know she was absolutely theologically correct in all of her dealings with her daughter who is pregnant out of wedlock. She didn’t mention a thing about what the husband and father of the daughter thought. I s’pose he cussed that day and chewed too much tobacco.

Husbands

Oh, wow, and if ya start out bein’ a mother and a conscience to your husband, you will be that all of your life. By the time the man is old, he won’t take any responsibility for himself and will act like a 2-year-old. But, see, it is your pride that makes you think you are smarter and wiser than your husband. But a wise mother will humble herself unto God and let the Lord take the husband’s sorry self in hand.

Your husband may not be wiser than you. But the soldier in the army does not have the place or authority as the sergeant. The soldier may have all kinds of worthy ideas but the plan can’t work as it is out of the holy authority of God. We as wives cannot pull rank out of fear and run ahead of Husband and try to run the home. We have no authority to do so.

Now, no, I don’t believe in child abuse. If the husband is abusing the child, the mother should step in. But a lot of times, the husband is a lot rougher than what we mothers would be. We have to realise that. God has a plan for our chldren. They have the dad that they were called to have. He has instincts and dreams for his children that we don’t know about. See, once a man knows that the wife won’t interfere, then he knows he is on his own. He knows if he falls, that he will have to pick his own self up.

Godly submission to an unbelieving husband isn’t “Yes sir. No sir.” It is as Christ on the cross. Jesus went willingly to the cross. No one made him do it. He did it for a purpose. He wasn’t on the cross because the soldiers scared Him into it. He gave His life for us. He had a purpose and it was to please the Father God. He was a servant and didn’t answer the soldiers back who mocked Him. He had a bigger plan in mind — He was dying for our sins. Can’t ya just see Jesus Christ sayin’ “I won’t be a doormat for any man.” Well, thank God He was a doormat, as we would all be going to hell about now. But He obeyed God and died for our sins. He was the doormat to heaven. But ya know, we have to learn to die to ourselves and what we want.

See, if you as a wife are just plain lily livered and are so codependent upon your husband, you won’t be anything worth the Lord’s time, anyway. A submissive wife is a wife that lives as a queen. Jesus is our King and Lord. A wife who acts like Christ is a Queen and is as Sarah’s daughters who are not afraid with any amazment.

I never submitted to Jim because I was too ugly to find another man to run off with. I submitted to my husband as the Word of God told me to. The church took up a collection plate to help me with a divorce. Well, I didn’t want a divorce, as God hadn’t told me to get one. I don’t move as the church tells me to move but as the living Jesus Christ tells me to move.

Following religion will get you into a lot of trouble. Look to your husbands and see where the Lord is leading them. Don’t ask your husband about his spiritual life — just let him share it with you if he wants to. But observe him and pray for him and be his helper. Yes, he ain’t perfect — maybe he is smokin dope or whatever. Well, that’s his fault! The way to keep him on dope is to nag him and produce fear for him to ride high on. We have some troubled homes out there. But it won’t get better if we don’t have some wives who are ready to lay their lives down to God and expect God, by faith, to save the family. The buck has to stop someplace.

When will we wives take on our place as submissive wives and have homes who are run by God? Settle it today to give your husband his place as Priest of the home. And when you do, a peace will fall and you can do your homemaking. The spirit of homemaking and peace can’t come until you, Mother, take on your place of humility and submission to your husband. You will be a wreck trying to run your husband and be his mother. Let him be a man and cover you spiritually. He may not be the perfect preist of the home. But you can’t take his place.

Abused Wives

See, some of these women who Oprah has hoodwinked on her show who are so pitiful — it isn’t that they were loving, submissive Christian wives and their husband took advantage of them. NO, they were lily livered to start with. Then they got married! Yikes! And when the problems came, they ran out the door. They were too fearful to stay and fight in the spirit realm for their marriage. They didn’t care about the children or putting God first. They put a good marriage and their happiness above the Word of God. And in so doing, they keep going from one man to the next. One abusive situation to the next. They spout, “Well, this next husband is the man God wanted for me.” Well, was he the father your children chose, too?

See, a strong Godly woman won’t run out. She thinks enough of herself and has enough confidence in herself to stay in a bad situation as she trusts in God to change things. She is a Queen and has dignity and purpose and she knows this. She understands that she is also a sinner and maybe down the road she will need mercy, too. Jim and I were nothing more than two good forgivers. Blessed are the merciful for they shall obtain mercy. And if you can’t be merciful to your own children’s father, then, Darlin’, you had better watch your back for the rest of your life.

Yes, some of these religions that oppress women ain’t right. They are cults and certainly this is not the Bible way. But even at that, God could use a godly woman like an Esther to pray her way out of that, too. Nothing is impossible with God.

Well, I have to blast! Baby David will be here for me to watch in a half hour.

Who was that queen in history that had a wild and crazy husband but she was kind and fed the poor in her land? I have that story someplace. But, anyway, now what would have happened had she turned tail and ran and gave up her place as queen?

Also, I have heard of so much child molestation by the stepfathers to the daughters. It’s not usually the real father.

Mothers and Wives, today let’s get some fire in our bones and steel in our spines and decide to go God’s ways and have real Christian homes.

Love,
Connie

Dear Mothers,

This morning I was watching Christian TV. They had a good teaching on wisdom. I think the preacher’s name was Keith Moore? It was good and I took notes. Of course, he spoke from the man’s point of view. Couldn’t ya just see him speaking from the teaching on wise women? If he had of quoted Proverbs 14:1, you would have heard a BOOOM that would have reached clear to the moon this morning.

Proverbs 14:1 “Every wise woman builds her house and the foolish woman tears it down with her hands.” It doesn’t say “Some wise women build up their homes and some wise women leave the home and put their children in Daycare and go out to seek their fortune in the street.” But since I think the Lord is speaking now to some about wisdom, I thought it was a good time for me to write on it.

Preacher was saying there is a difference between knowledge and wisdom. Knowlege is being aware of something and wisdom is knowing how to deal with knowledge. Wisdom means skillful. We can be skilled in homemaking but if we don’t have the knowledge of the Word, then we don’t know what to be skillful in.

The worldly church tries to get the woman out of the home to be skillful in the work place. But God calls the wise woman home to learn to be skillful. Also the wise woman can discern good from evil. She can discern the times and seasons she is in. And good night! I mean we need to learn the skills of home and how to be self sufficient. We are in dangerous times in our country. We need to learn how to somehow make it with the wisdom of God.

Love,
Connie

Dear Mothers,

Yesterday I was talking to MaryL on the phone. She is my mentor and is 77 years old. Anyway, I was telling her a story and she says, “Connie, have you written this story on the email?” I said, “No, I hadn’t.” Then my friend Ruth came over later in the day and we were sitting outside talking in the yard. I told her the story, too. OK, here it is.

About a year ago, the devil had really whispered in my ear that our Christian Joy was a hopeless case. I mean she is a lovely girl and works hard at making PUNK ROCK outfits for the Yeah Yeah Yeahs! In some people’s eyes, she is a big success. Her band was on the David Letterman show, just lately. It has been very overwheming to me as her mom. And Chrissy and I get along fine, as she is very loving and supporting of me. And ya know, I just thought in my heart, “She is a beautiful girl and we get along fine but she will probably go to hell and I can’t worry about it. I have done all I could.” I thought she was my Judas in the scheme of things, a lost cause, really. I had lost all hope and I thought in my heart, “Connie, don’t tell anyone what you think but Chrissy is going to hell and nothing can be done.” And I thought, “Ya know, she will never find a man to love until she leaves NYC.” To me, this was all carved in stone and I wasn’t going to tell anyone about what I thought. I just thought this was my cross to bear and I wasn’t going to bug Chrissy or anyone about it. I thought, “I will just B.S. my way through with her but she is going to hell.” I thought it was signed and sealed by God.

So here comes Chrissy home about a month before her Dad died to introduce Jason to the family. I just went along as usual, tryin’ to keep peace in the family. I sit and listen to music with the kids and we talk. Chrissy says, “Mom, Jason plays the piano and I said, “Oh, good, Jason, please play for us.” He is a professional musician. Well, he has a regular day job, as all NYC people do, and then they play music and try to make it BIG. Most people who go to NY don’t make it big but leave it to my kids to do so. So, anyway, I fully expected Jason to play something worldy on the piano and he sat down to play and played the most HOLY Christian song I had ever heard. It was a song of worship to the Lord. Not an old religious song — no — but a song that touched my heart and caused my heart to sing again. He not only played it so beautifully but he sang from his heart about Jesus. Talk about being ashamed of myself, for not trusting in the Lord.

Jason has been an angel in my life. He and I sit and talk about spiritual things and Christian Joy doesn’t even seem to hear us. I think he is an angel disguised as Christian Joy’s boyfriend. Chrissy told me lately, “Mom, when I can’t understand you, Jason explains you to me.” I am like, “Hmmmm.” He reminds me a lot of Jim after Jim got saved. And Chrissy says he reminds her of me. I think he is just what God did. Jim and I prayed for Christian and I think the Lord answered Jim’s and my prayers and gave Chrissy a man who was like me and Jim. “Jim and Connie” seems to be written all over Jason.

Last night in the night, I felt so hopeless concerning Mary and Brandon. Oh, I just felt tormented as my heart bled for them. I tossed and turned all night in prayer. But this morning, as I write about our Sissy Joy and Jason, I know the Lord hears my prayers. He does not leave us forsaken concerning our children.

We Moms just suffer like wounded dogs lost in the dark. We raise our children to know Christ and some of these kids — ya just swear they are hopeless! But if God can send Christian Joy an angel for a boyfriend, He can do anything. Jason doesn’t even talk to Chrissy about the Lord that I know of. But she is used to me saying, “Oh, the Lord did this for me and that.” And so if Jason talks about the Lord to me, it isn’t foreign to her. It goes over her head — so far, anyway.

But ya know, we Christian Mothers are just tormented to death at times over our kids. No, not when they are young, usually, but as they get older. I mean we are bigger than they are when they are young and we can control them usually. But when they get to be adults, it’s different. I swear I planned on my last 3 kids being perect and when they weren’t — Oh, man, the Lord heard a wailin’ in heaven He has never heard before. (Well, almost.)

When David, my son of faith, left home at 18, I picked bleeding hearts flowers from my garden and put a bouquet where David sat at the table. Broke my heart! When he went on to have Baby Rose without ever marrying the mother, my heart tore out of my chest. Still he isn’t married and Jim’s and my heart just broke. But ya know what, dear Mothers? God is still on the throne.

Are we more worried about our reputation or our kids lives? I am embarrassed to death most of the time. But God must think I am worth something. I seem to have some amount of truth in my soul. And now Sharon is putting together another book for me. She says she needs it. I am thinking, “Who on earth would follow me if they had any sense?” I think of myself as the backwards Titus 2 mother. I am supposed to have kids I can brag on — well, I can brag on some of ”em. But God tells me, “Connie, if you will follow me and keep goin’ with the Titus 2 ministry, I will take care of your kids.” Well, God knows I need all the help I can get.

I keep reminding the Lord that the oxen that plows the field is welcome to eat all he wants as he plows. If he wasn’t plowing and workin’ his tail off, he wouldn’t have anything to eat. No, if I was to start teaching as soon as my kids were perfect, then that would be when Hell freezes over.

This little dab of religion we try to teach our kids often is just enough religion to bug ‘em and not bless ‘em. And ya know, our kids coming up aren’t like some of us were in years past. Our kids are dealing with a lot of culture that we never had to face. Our sons NEED to be sons of Thunder! We are raising sons now that have to be warriors and Revolutionalists. If we don’t raise our daughters to be stout hearted in the home and full of courage — oh, we have missed the boat. Some of us moms hate our kids’ lives. But didn’t we give our children to Jesus to train?

A lot of these tattoos and piercings seem to look so war-like to me. Is this our kids’ ways of acting out being warriors for Jesus? They are young; they have a certain amount of light. We can’t stand there and judge them according to our own lives. Man, I don’t even have pierced ears. I did as a young girl but I don’t now. When I was 9, I talked my Mom into it. And the neighbor kids thought I was a Gypsy. Anything to be radical, ya know? Even at 9 years old. That was in the 1950s. So that was pretty racy then. Well, and when I was in high school, I wore safety pins in my ears. Just to be bad. Then I forgot the whole thing and don’t even have pierced ears now. Christian Joy told her teachers at school I was a biker and had tattoos all over my body. Oh, that Christian Joy! I don’t have any tattoos. Thank God! But now Dan and Johnny, they have enough tattoos for all of us put together. And Jim put his own on when he was young. Stuff like “Born to Lose.” Well, that’s ok — I wrote “Nothing is impossible with God” on his heart. And that’s what counts, huh?

And ya know, in the 1980s when I was homeschooling, the teaching was that if your kid didn’t mind, just throw him out of the house. Boy, I was for that. But Papa wasn’t. I mean, I wasn’t heartless but I thought it would turn the kid around. And I thought it would be for a few days. But Jim wasn’t like that. Jim would say to me, “Connie, our kids aren’t any different than anyone else’s kids and they will be alright.” I would get all religious and want to go by the books about tough love and all. But Papa was so full of love.

And ya know, in the Old Testement, if a son was rebellious, then they were to be killed. Hmmm! But Jim dealt with his rebellious children as I had dealt with him. He walked with them through the valley of the shadows.

Our son John helped my mom yesterday with yard work. It took hours to dig this huge bridal bush out of her yard. After that, John had to go to work. My mom said, “Wow, he is a good worker.”

Oh, my gosh! I would have died to hear that in the 90s when John was so lazy I could have drowned him in gasoline. He was so lazy and would never take a bath. One day we were in the car with my mom and dad who thought I was nuts, anyway. And they said, “What is that smell?” And I said, “Oh, that’s Johnny — he won’t take a bath.” I would order him into the bathtub and he would fall asleep in there and then get out without ever washing. The other kids lived for this moment and would get a bucket of ice and throw it over the shower curtian on John’s sleeping head. I thought the boy was utterly hopeless and I cried buckets of tears. And wrote tablets of prayers to Jesus.

Oh, John is a precious son now. I couldn’t live without him. He and his lovely wife and son moved here from Missouri. They felt the Lord calling them as they said we needed them. And, oh, we did! Christine, John’s wife is as Ruth was to Naomi to me. God knew what He was doing.

Papa and God knew how to handle John and I was a grieved mother who could barley stand it. But I had to submit to Jim on all of this. He was never all that religious or taken up with the teaching of the day. I mean some of you, your husbands are like Dr. Dobson or like Mike Pearl. So it’s good that you follow this teaching. But my husband was not and I had to submit to my own husband as unto the Lord. Our husbands are called by God to lead us and we have to let them. They have a special calling to lead the family and we can’t interfere with that.

In closing, we as mothers must cast down our fears and evil imaginations. We must trust in God with our chidlren. And all of our children will be taught of the Lord and great will be their peace.

Love,
Connie

Yesterday J from the letters group came to visit and we had a ball. J is a happy mother of 4 children. Noah is the youngest and he is 3 months old. And the oldest girl is 5. Is all of that right, J? Anyway, J brought homemade bread and cookies and I made soup in the crock pot. I made a pig of myself on J’s bread. Anyway, as we sat outside and watched the children play, I was telling her about K on the response group. I had been praying about your question, K, that goes like this. “How does a mother with many children find the time to seek the Lord and pray?” Well, this is what I came up with in prayer.

See, the mother with many children just doesn’t have as much time to pray as she will when the children get older and out of the house. I think the Lord calls the older Titus mother to help out and somehow go to bat for her. I mean when her back is up against the wall.

See, even though Dixie was only a year older than me, she only had one child. So very often, Dixie would be prayed up when I was lost in a fog. But actually, it overloaded Dixie, too, as she was still the younger mother. Between Jill, Dixie and I, the blind led the blind for the most part. We became makeshift older mothers to each other. It was as though the mother had died and the sisters were left in charge of each other. In reality, the older Titus Mother in the church has indeed died and we were abandoned.

I think I especially felt the loss, as I had six children and Jill had two and Dixie one. God had called the older Titus mother to me but I guess she disobeyed, as I never saw her. I would cry on my knees to God to send her. I felt cheated and I grieved so for the comfort of the older woman. Then one day, when I became 50, I became the older Titus Mother. People say about the Titus 2 mother that it isn’t her age but her spiritual growth. Well, I think it is a woman whose children are mostly grown and the growth in her spirit has come as she is faithful in her calling as Keeper at Home.

See, the young married mother isn’t supposed to run off and get a career. Then learn the fruits of the Spirit as she submits to her boss and learns how to get along with the other worldly people she works with. She isn’t supposed to get a college education. She is married with children and her spiritual education is now learned in the trenches. She learns the fruits of the Spirit as she cares for her family. She isn’t to run from true education and try to get a job. The Lord has set her up to be a queen in her palace to care for her own children. Not a slave who must run to the street to pick up its trash.

There is no higher calling than keeper at home. It is a private home school for the Mother and wife. She lives in protection as she learns to know God. I mean to really know God the Bible way. Not the way the world tells you to know God. In this place of seclusion with the children, you can learn true patience and humility, long suffering and gentleness. It’s easy, Darlin’, to be gentle and nice to the neighbors. But in the middle of the night when Baby has awakened you for the 10th time is when you learn true love and long suffering. That’s when you learn what life is all about.

And until you learn to be a keeper at home as a young mom, you won’t be the Titus 2 Mother when ya get older. A mother can’t be unfaithful all of her life and then, when she gets older, she decides she is too tired to do anything else, so she decides to be the Titus 2 Mother. It don’t work like that. What you do as a young mom NOW counts. The battles you win in prayer as a young mom will be what makes you effective as you become the older Titus Mother.

The body of Christ needs the ministry of Mother in the church. But the church has played games for a long time and it shows. The Word of God is blasphemed. Mother ran out. Titus 2:3-5.

Run-Away Mother

See, this is why we have child porn, abortions, birth control for Christians. Divorce, gay marriage, bad schools that are nothing more than government run babysitters. Wife swapping. Well, it’s all feminism. The plague of this century.

It’s because the world has invaded mother’s temple. The world has walked right into her quiet place where the meek and quiet spirit is to be hidden, groomed and fed. It’s been like throwing 10 foxes in a hen house of sleeping chickens. The women who have no spine will become hysterical and fly out of there with every excuse in the book. But Sarah’s daughters are not afraid with any amazement. Sarah’s daughters will stand back in a secret place and hide away until the Lord kills the fox.

The Virtuous Mother ain’t runnin’ for anyone and especially fear won’t drive her out. Her heart is fixed, trusting in the Lord. She announces that all of her children are blessed. No evil shall befall her and no plague will come nigh her dwelling. She isn’t afraid of the Bird Flu or hurricanes or any other catastrophe — though 10,000 shall fall at her side it will not come nigh her. Only with her eyes will she see the reward of the wicked. Psalms 91. Mother is in the the hallow of His hands. The death angels pass over her house as she has the blood of Jesus upon every door post. She knows Jesus as Savior and is praying for her family.

Mothers, we can’t run out of the secret place and expect the Lord to run after us. We must stay hidden away in our nest and blend with the branches. God won’t run after us, catch us and throw us back into the secret place of our temple. (Our place of submission to our husbands as unto the Lord.) We can’t enter the temple unless we are willing to bow our heads and lower our eyes. We must come back into the holy place with our spiritual coverings of wifely submission. You can’t pound a square piece of flesh into a round hole. We must spiritually fit ourselves into our secret place. We must submit to our own husbands as unto the Lord.

There isn’t 40 ways to be the virtuous woman. The Bible only shows us one way. EVERY wise woman builds her home and the foolish tear it down with their hands. So you are either tearing the home down or building it up. You are either fearful or in faith. Either you will choose to be evil or holy. Choose this day whom you will serve. God or the devil? Either you want a home or you don’t. And many of you young women on here will either be made or broken by your family. Either Satan will break you and make you turn tail and run or you will remain steadfast trusting in the Lord.

Virtuous women don’t run in flocks or Bible studies. The true Bible virtuous woman was as a rare flower hidden away in God’s secret garden. She is the ruby upon His hand. She is the pure white rose with drops of tears upon each petal. She is called out from among them to be Holy into the Lord. She comes willingly to the secret place, her heart is soft and she trusts only in Him. She is as Esther who lays down her life for her people. She feeds His sheep as she loves Him and Him alone. She is wise as she knows the times and the seasons of things. No one pushes her to do anything. She is confident in her quietness and strength in God. She is not guilt ridden, allowing other women to take her strength. She is surefooted, trusting only in Him.

The devil tries to condemn us but God knows what we will do. Satan tries to scare us out of the home to confuse us. Also to divide us from our husbands. He wants to divide and conquer us as we run out from our covering. We are not make-shift maids to cover all the basis the world would have us fill. We are specialists, gifts to our families. Queens set apart to work in the palace of the Lord. Our children are prophets and handmaidens. Our children are gifted spiritually as we have raised them, not with money, but golden faith.