I am up in the night prayin’ and rockin’ and rollin’. Now what kind of sentence is that? How can a person rock and roll and pray seriously at the same time? I dunno. I guess when I say that, I mean this. I am up in the night trying to keep my mind on the word of God and off the negative thoughts. And I guess at times that means to get your sorry hide out of bed and get your self movin’ so you can think more clearly about the Lord.

Well, you can pray in bed and toss and turn and wake your husband up. But if you are in a real jam, then that half prayin’ won’t do much good. No, for the jams I get into, I have to be fully awake to handle them. I have to get up out of my half asleep state of mind and get out my power tools and run a buzz saw through the middle of a block of hell. Nothing short of ripping the top off the devil’s head will do, I guess. Not that I am up to it. And it’s early in the morning and not the middle of the night, I guess. I just looked at the clock. I can still tell time … life is good.

Now see how I inch up to the Holy Spirit to get a drink of water. And ya know, if ya don’t learn anything else from me, I think you may learn how to enter the realm of the Holy Spirit through my instructions. See I have a lot of silliness inside of me. Probably that aint good? But I dunno, the Lord uses it, I guess. My neighbor Miss Charlotte says when she is down and can’t get back up, she says she just comes to my house to laugh. And sometimes you do just have to see the funny side of life.

But to enter the realm of the Holy Spirit, you have to first pray out what is in your crazy head to start with. We have to start out in the flesh, as we can’t start out in mid air? So we have to maybe write or pray out whatever is in our hearts first. Then we have to apply the word of God to whatever is in our hearts. And then we throw the problems over our shoulder, forget it, and go on and see what God has planned for us for the day.

Getting me to go on and forget my problems is like trying to get a mule to run a hundred miles an hour. Sometimes it almost takes an act of congress to get this miserable piece of hide goin’. But I just bug the Lord and goof off and tell Him that if He don’t give me any answers, then I can’t give ‘em to anyone else. He knows that and I know that, and so we try to get along somehow.

But don’t forget that He was a revolutionary and He could care less what the world thinks. And He is yoked up with me and I am a scaredy-cat. And yet … well … I guess I know that if I just keep whistling in the dark, that He will lead me and guide me. Well, He always has. And ya know, it ain’t so bad, bein’ me. Atleast I know that I am nothing without Him.

See now, how I am losing my sense of humor and getting into some serious stuff, as the Holy Spirt comes over me? One of the reasons some of you get set free by my writings is that I don’t write this stuff. It is the Holy Spirit through me. I know how to get to Jesus and He is the answer … your answer.

See, I had to know Jesus, really know Him when I was a young wife. I used to say to Jesus, “Lord, I don’t want to hear from the flesh. I want to hear from you.” He had an audience with me. I wanted Him and His will more than anything in the world.

And if you love Him, seek Him. Seek Him in the early morning hours while the perverts and strange women are asleep. Seek Him for a quiet hour of prayer and Bible reading.

When I was a deserted wife, you should have seen my bed at night. I went to sleep with my Bible and study books galore around my bed. Bible dictioneries and a concordance. I had a big Family Bible that I studied out of, too. I mean that thing weighed almost 10 pounds I would guess. I wore out Bibles from reading them. The pages would just fly out and I would pick them back up and stuff them back in. I never left the house without a Bible.

Soaked In Him

See, I went through many hard things as a young mother, as many of you all do. I understand what some of you ladies are telling me. Been there and done that. And I am here to tell ya that the world don’t have the answers. And you have to find out who the Lord is, for yourself. The Lord wants to have a personal relationship with you. He wants to enter your life and be your Savior here on earth as well as in heaven. But He is a Holy God and you have to seek Him in Holiness and separation unto Him. He isn’t like the world and His ways are not our ways.

You have to understand submission to your husband through the word of God. You have to know that the word is true and prove it in your own life. I mean, I can tell you what God has done for me and my marriage. Yet you have an inner court in your own heart and God has to be God in that inner court of your Temple. It can’t be Connie’s writings that run your show. It has to be God who lives in you.

Right now, ask the Lord to forgive you for your sins. And ask Him to enter the throne room of your heart. The inner court of your temple. Let Him be the one who runs your home. Let Him make the rules and be the King of the kings in your home. Yes, we submit to our husbands and they are our kings. But Jesus Christ is the King of kings and Lord of lords.

As you, dear wife and mother, believe Him and let His word have its way in your home, you will make Jesus Lord over your home. Give Him your burdens and cares. Cast them over onto Him. Walk in faith and through the visons He has given you. Learn to live from the inside out. His kingdom in you is more reality than what you see with your eyes. For what we see with our eyes is temporary and will pass away. But Jesus and His word is eternal. And many of the decisions that you make on this earth will effect heaven for an eternity.

We were bought with a price. Jesus gave His life for us. He shed His blood for us. In this world of throw away babies, we misunderstand our places in God. We think of ourselves sometimes as just another person taking up space. But, no, the Lord has called us for a purpose. He has called us to move heaven on earth with our prayers and our faith. We are called to have mountain moving faith and to speak to the problems and cast them down. We are called to build His kingdom on this earth. As God’s people were always called to take over the land, we are called to fight battles, also, and to take over territory for Jesus Christ.

And I dare say that ain’t gonna happen just because a bunch of church folks get together and all believe the same thing, or if they get together and get enough money together to own the world. No, all it will take is a man with a plan. One man with a plan and the truth under his belt. One drop of truth anointed of God will multiply into more and more truth. When Jesus came onto the earth He came to a religious set of rules. And He respected the rules and added many of His own. He gave us the truth that set the captive free. He was one drop of truth that changed the whole world. The truth will set the captive free.

No, I don’t understand the whole Bible. I just read whatever the Lord leads me to read by His Holy Spirit. He knows I love Him and so He leads me to the truth. He is the way the Truth and the Life. I know that the Word of God doesn’t call me to have a career because there is no example of this in the Bible. It don’t take a genius to figure that out. I am not so sure of all the things I am to be, but I know that I am to submit to Jim and not run out from His covering. Duh? That is clear in the word. And I know that, as an older woman, I am to teach the younger married woman to love her husband and children and to be a keeper at home. And if I don’t, then the word is blasphemed.

Sons of Thunder

And ya know, I think the Lord has me to teach the way I do as to put His house in order. I feel a great revival is coming as the Lord causes us women to submit to our husbands. As we pray for them, many men of God will come forth. We must stay out of their way and let them be Gods sons. Yes, they look pretty bad at times but this should call us to pray for them.

The Lord needs for us to be mighty prayer warriors and to keep our homes solid and in the wisdom of God. We must teach our men who are so unruly sometimes. Not by our words but by our examples of holiness and Godliness. By our good works in our homes. Let them see our good works and glorify our Father who is in heaven. We need to pray for our families and God will set them free to be daughters of light and sons of thunder.

We need men who are warriors and not afraid to get dirty. Dr Dobson has had his day. I mean God Bless him. But now it’s time to get down and dirty for Jesus and lay some iron on the devil’s head, and blow him back to hell. Our men must be warriors, strong in the Lord and in the Power of His might.

Pray, dear wives and mothers, for your husbands and praise and reverence them. They are sleeping giants, as God has called them to be sons of God.

I slept last night, so I didn’t get up in the night. I am only up early morning … it’s 6:00 A.M. I am up preparing for Baby to come midmorning.

It’s still pretty cool here in Iowa. I may make bean soup for lunch. Yes, I guess I will. Just looked in the freezer and I see I have a ham hock, and I know I have about 5 slices of bacon frozen. I will put my washed beans in my pot covered with water and some salt. Then I will bring the beans to a boil. Shut them off and let ‘em set about an hour. Then I will drain all the water off of them and then add the water again and the ham and bacon and seasonings and let them cook on the stove. They will be ready for lunch.

Also to the bean pot, along with the meat, I will add onion slices big enough for Papa to see, so he won’t accidentally eat one? He is a prized onion hater. Anyway, I will add chives from my garden and maybe some rosemary. Also, I have some green pepper. I will put in a slice of that to float on top of the soup for flavor. Papa won’t eat green peppers, either. But Jim and Baby both love beans, so they will love the soup. I have a package of the dried beans that have the 15 different kinds in them. Also to my soup, I will add the coursely ground black pepper and salt and garlic powder.

And I will add a can of diced tomatoes. When Christian Joy was a vegetarian, I would make bean soup for her when she came to visit. If you aren’t adding any meat, you need extra flavor, so I made the soup with the tomatoes and she loved it. If you are making a big batch of soup, then add 2 cans of tomatoes. You could even add a can of tomato soup. I had never fixed the bean soup with tomatoes before I had fixed it for Joy, but Jim loved it, so I always add tomatoes to my bean soup now.

Jim loves all kinds of beans, so when Baby sees Grand Papa eating his beans, she wants to eat them, too. She is a real Beanie Baby.

I have some leftover homemade bread that I will make croutons out of. Papa loves these. I just slice the homemade bread and butter it, and then cut it in little cubes. You could use store bought bread, too. Anyway, I just cut the cubes up and have my cookie sheet buttered, and I just put the cubes on the sheet. Then I add my seasonings to the cubes. I will add seasoning salt and garlic and black pepper. Baby girl loves bread, so I know she will like the croutons. Then I just bake the croutons at about 375

This is so easy it’s embarrassing.

Just pick your rhubarb and cut the leaves off and wash the dirt off. Cut the stalks in about 1-inch pieces until you have 5 cups of rhubarb, then put the pieces in a big pan for the stove. Add to this pot 5 cups of sugar. Turn the pan on and let this cook.

Now, if ya stir it fast enough you won’t have to put any water in. But if ya wanna, you can add a fourth cup of water … it won’t hurt it. But the rhubarb will produce its own fruit along with the sugar as it cooks.

Well, anyway, let it cook until the rhubarb pieces are soft and tender, not mushy. Then, when it is all done, add a small package of strawberry Jello. The jam will thicken as it cools.

I used to just keep this jam in a big jar in the fridge for the children when they were young. They loved it and would eat it pretty fast. But it’s not hard to can it, either. Just get out about 4 pint glass jars and fill the jars while the jam is very hot. Work quickly as you fill the jars with hot jam. Then add the lids and the screw top bands and screw them on tight. Wipe the jars off good and let them set on the cupboard until they are cool and can be put away.

I wouldn’t do this with the baby around. No way! Our baby Rose is so quick, she would grab the jam off the cupboard. I never allowed my babies in the kitchen when i was canning anything. It’s too risky.

Also, I am so longing to can tomatoes this summer. Last night, I cud just smell those tomatoes cooking on my stove. I love to make ketchup and let it cook all day. Papa loves my homemade ketchup. I make it in the fall after the other canning is done. I am missing the smell of tomatoes cooking this year more than i ever have. My children loved this ketchup and ate a lot of it. But Papa ate it even more. He loved it on everything, even fried potatoes.

Well, I had better get busy.

Well, it is 2:00 in the morning. I am up writing. I didn’t want to get up and was being stubborn. But I know from experience that if I don’t get up when the Lord calls me, there will be hell to pay. Why is my life so intense? None of us know the answer to that question.

I won’t have the Baby today and Jim and I will just do errands and maybe go to the Dollar Store, etc. I have to go to the grocery store. Then later I have to go help my mom with some housework.

I don’t even know why I am up. I guess the Lord has a message stirring in my heart. I don’t know what it is.

I do wonder at times if the Lord is just wanting me to be to you the example of living in the Spirit. See, we have to train our human spirits to listen to God. Often there isn’t a clear cut idea, a yes or no answer to our questions about our lives. Life is always a process. As you can tell, often when I begin to write I don’t know what the Lord wants to say. But yet, by faith, I lay my hands to the keyboard and move with the Holy Spirit. Then He often has a message to all of us. I just go with the flow of His Spirit. If He gives me a strong feeling about something, then I write about it.

The word says that we have an unction from the Holy Spirit and we know all things. And that the Holy Spirit teaches us. Well, many of you have the Holy Spirit but need to know how to move with Him. And even though many times my writings are foot loose and fancy free, and the run on sentences are bad and the spelling atrocious, I think the Lord is showing you through it all how to chase the Holy Spirit. And the Holy Ghost is the man with the plan. He is the one you need to look to.

Many times in my life I have had my back to the wall. I learned early on not to put my trust in man, but in the Holy Spirit.

We need to read the word of God and memorize a lot of it because the Lord desires to bring to rememberence the things He has told you. If you don’t write His word on your heart, then He can’t remind you of it. And He won’t teach you to walk in the Holy Spirit until you know the word of God. Because if you are just sitting around waiting to see an angel and you don’t know the word of God, you are fixin’ to see some mighty strange demons! No, the word of God is the fence of the Holy Spirit. You need to read the word and be able to try the spirits to see which ones are of God.

See, you should be able to hear the Holy Spirit in your own heart. You should hear a voice of God telling you things and instructing you. The word says that the Lord’s sheep hear His voice and another voice they will not obey.

We need to cast down our idols and put Jesus Christ and His word as the top authority in our lives. The world will try to get you to buy all kinds of sickness and lies of the devil. But ya know, we don’t live by the ways of the world? We are to live by the inner voice of God in our spirits.

Jesus leads us into all truth. He is the way the truth and the life. Someday His voice will be more plain to us but now, we must seek Him and seek to be filled with His Holy Spirit. Just pray and ask Him to fill you with His Holy Spirit so that you can hear clearly His voice.

Now, if you are worldy and out runnin’ all day, then you can’t hear His voice. Some of you have to be out there as under submission to your husbands. But some of you are just out there runnin’ around doin’ nothing and being worldly and the Lord won’t protect you and your foolishnes. You have to keep the Lord first place in your heart.

And if He calls you in the night to get up to pray then, Darlin’, you better get up and go for it. Even when I had tiny babies and a house full of children, I would get up in the night to pray. I had to. My life was so intense that staying in bed and not listening to the Lord was dangerous.

MOVING BY HIS SPIRIT

Ya know, often I can’t hear the Lord during the day. Too much goin’ on. And I need the quiet time of the early morning hours to pray.

When my children were all home, I would worry so much about feeding them. It became clear to me that I was gonna need some major groceries and that I could not live like the women around me. Once we went off welfare, Jim never looked back. He didn’t want me to go get free government cheese and all the free handouts. He said he was workin’ and we didn’t need it. Well, I didn’t want to disagree with him and make him feel that he wasn’t as good as any man. And I didn’t discuss with him that we were constantly lacking in what we needed. Jim was giving me what he could for groceries and household things. So I knew I couldnt ask for more than that. We had only enough money to scrape by. So I would wait until Jim had gone to sleep and I would get up and cry to the Lord and pray. I would tell Him that He had given me these children and now how was I to feed them?

That’s the way the Lord does in my life. He keeps me up a crick without a paddle. That way, I turn to Him and get His view on things and not the world’s view. Because if you are in dire straits, then you best be tuning in to the Holy Spirit and not the world. The world will continually lead you to more of the world and to its failures. But Jesus will lead you to some real answers in Him. He will lead you to prosperity in Him. Not the religious prosperity but Bible prosperity which is always a house full of children and food to feed them. Bible prosperity is a joyful mother with plenty of children and plenty of food to feed them.

So many times, I got up in the night and prayed for basic needs. After Jim was saved, he had the whole world to tackle. He had come up and out of a hell I never want to understand. What I did understand, though, was that he was doing his best and that was all any man could do. And I wasn’t about to make anything any harder on him. I just figured that God gave me my children and that I was to stay here and care for them, and I did. Jim didn’t want me to go to work and I didn’t want to go, either. But I tell ya, I worked like a dog keeping my family goin’. I was led of the Holy Spirit and without His leading, we would have failed.

If I had lived like the women around me, we would have failed. Often, the strange women would ask me how I was gonna make it. I could smile knowingly, as I had been up in the night with the Master of my soul. And He told me how we would make it and we did. Most of the time, as I was up in the night crying, the Lord would say to me “Now, Connie, the women during the Depression era made it with a lot less than what you have. If they made it, so can you.” And I would read stories about these women and gather courage unto my soul.

Yet without His Spirit leading me, I could not have made it. We had so many obstacles to overcome. The only solid thing in my life was the Lord. Please read my testimony. I don’t want to drag up my past again. It’s bad enough, living it once without reliving it as I write. But life was very hard for us and, without the leading of the Holy Spirit, there was no way we would have made it. We had all the problems you all have and then some.

At one time, as I cooked in my little kitchen, I mean that thing was fallin’ in. But I had to just keep cookin’ and believin’ God. And I had to do major cookin’, too. I couldn’t afford anything but the necessities. Things like sugar and flour and yeast and baking powder? Hamburger and potatoes and some chicken and a bit of this and that. And yet, the Lord got us through it all.

And the kids never went hungry or without warm clothes. I was up in the night prayin’ for winter hats and mittens and coats for the children.

The Lord heard me in the night praying and waiting upon Him. And the things I teach now are all things I learned in the trenches … in the night, waiting upon His Voice.

I am up in the night doing the wash. Just as Papa and I were going to sleep last night, I said to him, “Honey, do I have a clean work shirt for you to wear tomorrow?”

And Jim says, “No, but I can wear the same one. It isnt dirty.” Why do men always say that stuff?

I said, “No, I will get up early and wash your shirt.” So I am up in the night doin’ the wash.

My Mom was having tests at the hospital yesterday so I was there most of the day. I was really tired when I got home.

It was so cold yesterday. I wanted to fix Jim a nice supper and I know Annie will laugh when I say what I made. Annie says I like to throw milk and eggs on anything. Well, I had this potato cheese boxed mix? Jim loves potatoes, even those kind. Anyway, the box has these dried potatoes and the cheese mix and you are to just add a tablespoon of butter and 3 cups of milk. Well, this is what I did to make it a Super Deluxe Meal. I put in more milk and butter and about a fourth cup of flour. A half pound of cooked hamburger, eggs, a can of drained green beans, and a bunch of dried herbs. It was really good.

Jim doesn’t eat all day and waits to get home from work to eat, so I like to have something nice and hearty for him. A few days ago, I had to be on the phone with Mom at the hospital when wild man got home from work. He will come in the door and wave a silent wave and get right to the kitchen to look in the stove to see “whats cookin’.”

Last night it was to get down to freezing but I sure hope it didn’t get that cold, as we won’t have any fruit on our trees if it froze. The fruit trees are blooming and, if the frost hits the blooms, then they can’t set and grow fruit. It’s dark outside right now but as soon as its light, I will be lookin’ out the window to see if the frost hit the trees. The house doesn’t seem very cold, so maybe the temperature didn’t fall that low last night. I hope not!!!

Our big garden at the back of the yard, I hope to make a perennial garden out of this. That’s a garden I would never have to plant again, as it will be full of plants that come up each year. So far down in this garden, we have rhubarb, red raspberries, and horseradish. We planted strawberries down there just lately. And my friend Jill C. wants give me some more strawberry plants from her garden, as she cleaned hers out. A Mother’s Garden could never have too many strawberries, ya know. Soon I hope to plant asparagas, too, and it will come up each year.

And, ya know, a lot of folks don’t like rhubarb but it is one of our favorite fruits. Danny’s favorite is Strawberry Rhubarb Jam. Our children used to go through a whole batch of that jam in about a month. They ate it on bread, pancakes and biscuits. We love to eat rhubarb sauce, too. Just cut up the rhubarb in a pan and cook it up with sugar.

Often, in the old days in the spring, the cupboards at my house would get very bare. One year, I was without fruit for the children just as the rhubarb started to grow. I was so happy to have the fresh rhubarb to feed the children. I made a sauce out of it and fixed it in little bowls for the table for breakfast. Then I made the pies and jam with it.

Rhubarb is so easy to freeze. Just wash it and cut it up and put it in a ziplock bag with about a half cup of sugar to preserve it. Rhubarb takes a lot of sugar. That’s the only problem with this fruit. One thing I used to do, so I didn’t have to use quite so much sugar, is I would make pies with it using half apples. Or you could use peaches, too. Just some sort of a more bland fruit or berries.

My herb garden is doing well, it seems. I have many herbs in it, but one herb that I am especially interested in is gingerroot. I think it must take a lot of patience to grow this herb. You have to be careful not to dig it up to use it too quick. My ginger is a year old now but I think I need to let it alone for another year.

MOTHER’S HERB MEDICINES

Well, I just put wild man’s shirt in the dryer. God only knows where he put his shirt he wore yesterday … the dirty one? He probably has it in the bedroom and I can’t get in there and stir about or I will wake him up. God knows I keep that man awake enough in the night, anyway.

Ya know, when I first planted my red raspberry plants, I wasn’t wanting the fruit as much as the raspberry leaves. The leaves made into tea are a wonderful remedy for menstral cramps. Also to use for when you are pregnant to keep your uterus firm and in place.

When I was young and having my time of the month, I would drink this tea all day, cup after cup of it, as I did my housework. It really works. I would take a quart glass canning jar and make tea in it and just sip it all day. I would drink at least a quart or more. With any natural remedy like this, you have to use a lot of it. Herbs from your garden aren’t like from the health store. Your fresh garden herbs are more gentle but work good, too.

I used to dry the raspberry leaves also for the winter. I would just cut long branches from the bush and put them in a tall paper grocery bag and let them dry. After the leaves dry on the branches, you can just scrape the leaves off into the sack and put leaves in a dry jar to use for winter teas.

You can grow valerian, too, if ya need something to calm ya down. I grew some one year but used it too quick and the plant died. Some of these herbs take a few years to get going and ladies like me use them too quick and the plant dies.

Also with feverfew, you can get a good plant goin’ if ya leave it alone for a few years. Feverfew works good for headaches. I used to chew the leaves in with a stick of spearmint gum. I need to get busy and grow some more of that and valerian, too.

I guess you can grow St. John’s wort, too. I mean, some folks can. Jim has bought me several plants of this and I always manage to kill it.

With any of these herbs, you can just make teas out of the leaves. With the valerain you are to use the roots, I know, but I used the leaves and this worked well for tea. Actually, I drank more valerian tea then I should have and Papa came home form work to a very strange wife. Stranger than usual?

Yarrow is another good herb to use for colds or viruses. I have a lot of yarrow. It is a beautiful flowered herb. Mine is purple and comes up each year. But you are more woman than me if you can stand to drink yarrow tea! Well, I guess with enough honey, anything is possible. But once you drink some, you don’t want another cup for at least five years. I grow a blue flowering catnip beside the purple yarrow and it is very pretty as they grow together.

I am not good at growing lavender.

One of my favorite herbs, also, is my bushes of rose hips. Rose Hip Tea has more vitamin C than orange juice. It is a valuable herb to have. The hips come on after the roses have bloomed and fallen off. The berries or rose hips are easly dried for winter use. I just cut off branches and put them in baskets. They dry over time and look pretty while they do so.

Of course, I don’t use any poison sprays in my yard to kill weeds. Most of the weeds that folks kill are herbs. That little fern like stuff in your sidewalk crack may be chamomile. It has a little yellow bud on it and when you sqeeze it, it smells apple like. You can make chamomile tea out of this. My chamomile used to grow in the drive-way. My children knew when they had gotten to me, as they said I would make “Driveway Tea” to settle down.

But ya know, it’s just plain good “horse sense”to learn the art of using herbs for cooking and medicine. You may never have to use your herbs but then again, maybe you will.

PAPA’S ROSE OF SHARON

As I have written in the night about herbs for healing, it’s as though I can smell the fragrance of fresh herbs as I write.

I have been a little sick lately and I sense the Lord’s presence to heal me as I write about natural healing. His fragrance is so sweet … like wild purple violets in the spring. He is present to heal me and to give me joy as I write about the herbs. About Nature’s Medicine and the fragrance of Christ.

Papa … oh, Papa keeps planting for me each year the Rose of Sharon. About 10 years ago, Papa planted about seven bushes of wine colored roses of Sharon down by the back garden. They were tall bushes and so breathtaking as they bloomed in the summer. Papa knows I want to be secluded n our back yard to hang up the clothes on the clothes line and to do my garden duties. But as the years went on, the tall branches died because of the hard Iowa winters. The bushes weren’t secluded enough. So last year, Papa got some more Rose of Sharon bushes and planted them by the side of the house. They will have white blooms and will bloom this year.

Oh my dear old Darling … he never gives up. Sometimes I want to give up but I see Papa planting again and again, no matter what dies he never gives up. And he plants trees and gardens as though we will live forever here … Jim at 64 and me at 58. It seems that we don’t know how to roll over and play dead. We would like to but we always sense a newness in the spring. A time to get back up after a hard winter and start planting again. We are such gamblers and will keep planting, even though life looks hopeless sometimes.

Last week, when we went to the Amish villiage, Jim bought me some hay for my gardern. As Papa and me went a-riding down a country road to home, the hay smelled so bad we had to open all the windows in the car. I wanted old hay, as it’s better for the garden. I looked at Papa and thanked him for the hay. I had a smile on my face that couldn’t be taken off with a chisel. I said, “Papa, honestly, I would rather have three bales of hay then a new outfit or new shoes or anything.” I said I wished that folks would just give me hay for Christmas instead of all those gift certificates. And Papa understood me and he is the only one who would.

And I know I sound crazy, wanting hay for Christmas. But I had looked and looked for it around the garden shops and couldn’t find any, except the really expensive kind. If I have hay for my garden, I can grow wonderful things. Hay organizes me in my garden. And I can throw kitchen waste under it and recycle it. As the summer goes on, I will add grass clippings to the hay. All of this replenishes the soil.

I have just a small kitchen garden up by the house. My little 7 Sister Roses grow in the back of my kitchen garden. Papa offered to lay my hay down on my garden but I said, "No, I want to do it." I have some special herbs back there that I wont want covered. And I want to make sure my Sister Roses are all tucked in good, as they will be starting to bud soon.

Well, ya know, I better get back to bed. Papa’s shirt is washed and dried and laying on his chair for morning.

This writing tells such a story of hope and to not give up, but just keep planting seeds of faith and hope. And even though the cold winter winds blow and kill some of your plants … spring always comes again. “We can always plant again, right Papa?”

And if we don’t give up, we will see His glory.

Today Papa and me were at the grocery store. I was thinkin’ of the Food Network and the Paula Deen Show. I told Papa, as we walked through the aisle, “That Paula woman has really helped me a lot.”

Jim watches the show with me and we get a giant kick out of her show. Its on at 10:00 am and again in the afternoon at 3:00 pm. At first I didn’t watch her a lot and just got in on the show once in a while. But now I watch it if I can. I try every day. The show is called “Paula’s Home Cooking.”

Well, it’s so good and such wonderful down home cookin’ goin’ on. I am learning so much. I wouldn’t say that Paula is born again or anything … I dunno … but, boy, I am really learning some good cooking ideas. She cooks like I do but better. And Papa just loves the whole show and the recipes.

Paula is from Georgia and does the deep Southern cookin’. Today she showed us how to make grits and country ham. She said in her deep southern drawl, “This is a meal fit for a Country King.” She is always talkin’ about puttin’ the dog out and callin’ the men in for supper.

Some of you ladies that don’t know how to cook? This show would sure show you how. You have to have the cable channels, though. We didn’t have cable for a long time but got it lately. I don’t like the other cooks on there as well as Paula. She is a kick in the pants, let me tell ya.

Paula cooks for family. The rest of the cooks on TV seem to be making all of their food for parties.

Anyway, I love her show. She loves her dog so she cant be all bad, ya know?

Papa is workin’ on his wheelbarrow today. The wheel is broken. I made a meat loaf and put it in the fridge. He wants to eat late. The meatloaf is a good recipe I learned to make from Paula’s show. Also for supper, we are having baked potatoes and corn on the cob. Then I made a yellow cake and cut up strawberries for dessert. Then cold sweet tea to drink.

I will have Baby Rose today, the joy of my life. The last time we had her, I dressed her in a handmade praire dress I had gotten at a sale. It was from the 1970s, a yellow calico. Also a praire sunbonnet. She looked like a Little House on the Praire child.

And she still has potatoes and balls mixed up, so she takes a potato outside to throw about like a ball. It sounds so funny as we are playing and I say to her, “Go get your potato.” It’s nice, as potatoes don’t roll down the street and Gram don’t have to chase them. Baby will say “Ball” and throw the potato up in the air.

And, ya know, I was just praying in the chair this morning, and I just told the Lord how thankful I am for my cooking and baking things. I am so grateful that I have a private kitchen to cook in and if we have husbands that will work for us and let us stay home, then we really have a lot to thank the Lord for.

I love all of my cooking utensils. My favorite things I guess are my enamal spoons for stirring. I love looking for them when I go to garage sales and I have a nice collection of them. I have about a dozen spoons all sizes. Mostly they are the red with specks of white dots, and the dark blue. But I have gotten some lately that are the sort of light blue. I would love to find some of the light green ones that date back to the early 1900s. For mixing up muffins or biscuits, I like a small spoon, not the biggest mixing spoon. I like the spoon to be smaller if I am using a smaller crock bowl to stir in.

My big grayish blue mixing bowls are more favorites of mine. I just like to mix things by hand, I guess, and not get out my electric mixer.

Of course, I enjoy all the dishes the Lord has gotten for me over the years. My Grandmother loved dishes. Mom used to say that when Gram fixed a meal, she managed to use every dish in the house. And when Gram and Mom would got to town to shop, Gram always bought a dish at the dime store before she came home. The old time dime stores were the fun stores when I was a kid, and they always had pretty serving bowls to use for the table. It was just a bowl to serve a can of peas or green beans in, to set on the table. Mother never baked bread but always got out a bread plate to put on the table for my dad’s white sliced store bought bread. Many of the women in the old days loved their dishes, and they were very careful to take good care of them to make sure they didn’t get broken.

There used to be this word, “puttering.” When you would ask my Dad what he was doing in the garage with his tools, he would often say “Oh, I am just puttering, just foolin’ around.” He loved working with his tools and arranging them and organizing them. Often he would start out puttering and then would fix something, as his mind relaxed. And often the old time Mothers would do this in their kitchens. Sort of not really doing anything specific but many things in general. And as she puttered in her kitchen, the ideas would begin to flow. The old time Mothers thought that an organized kitchen meant an organized mind.

In my kitchen cabinets, I like the old fashioned look. I have taken brown paper sacks and made shelf paper. I crease it at the edge so the paper hangs over the shelf, then I cut designs in it with my scissors. The old time Mothers used to do that with brown sacks or newspaper.

I love the brown paper and use it. I found a neat glass bottle at a sale. I used it for buttons, but it had no lid. So I took brown sack paper and made a covering for my button bottle and then tied brown string around it. Dan saw it and said, “Oh, Mom I love that!”

Another item I enjoy collecting is the old “Country Living” magazines. I remember back in the 70s, when those magazines first came out, they were so anointed of God. If you can find some really old ones at sales, you would love reading them.

Lately I have thought of the organized church and the discernment has been so turned up in my heart. The Lord has told me things that are scary. I didn’t want to write it all down. I thought, “Wow, I am never going to tell that on the email!” I tried to forget it. But now, as I stand here writing, I wonder why I can’t forget it.

Well, are you all ready for this? The Lord told me that many churches — not all — are a hideaway for women who hate their husbands. It’s an escape. A place to run to get out of housework and the care of the children. It’s the only place a wife and mother can go to that touches her inner court and lies to her. When she goes to the grocery store and the other wives there sympathize with her over her boredom of housework, it means little to her, as she knows these women are unbelievers. Yet when she goes to church and the Christian women pat her on the back for putting up with her husband, then it pulls on her inner court. She allows the other Christian women into her inner man because “after all, Daaahling, these Sisters are Christian.” So, unknowingly, Mother is opening herself up to a lying spirit. And she eats this lie whole hog or none.

Mother is tired and doesn’t want to do her work. So husband is off work — why can’t he take the kids so she can go get refreshed at church? When he says that he wants her to stay home, she accuses him of being an unbeliever. Mother is not wanting to understand Christ but to get pity from her friends at church.

And say she does make it out the door. She comes back sullen and prideful as husband doesn’t do things like they do at church. Husband looks like a half wit up against the so called Christian books she has read. Mother has gone elsewhere to find her spiritual authority. She has become war weary at home. She thinks her husband’s rules are too hard and she feels she can’t submit to him as he isn’t where she is in Christ.

But we miss it here, dear mothers. Our husbands rules and regulations are to be too hard for us. Our husband’s ways are to bring us crying to the feet of Christ for answers. The place of wife and mother is the place often of sufferng. Without the cross we can’t see the Savior. Christ learned obedience through His sufferings.

Yes, we learn the word often as our husbands read it to us in family devotions. And this is what the worldly church often teaches. That the true husband will gather his family up each evening after supper and have devotions and if he don’t, then, by golly, he is an unbeliever. Maybe so or maybe not. Most Christian men are not Dr. Dobsons. Most men will not pray with you over every ache and pain or emotional upset. We get the idea that if he would go to church he would pray on command. But most men won’t?

In most homes it goes like this. The wife says, “Honey, I need prayer.”

Husband: “Ok what now? Now what did I do?”

And then you say, “Never mind. I knew you would say that.”

Then husband says, “Well, soooorrry I am not as good as the preacher at church. Why don’t you just go live with him?”

Well, ya know, Husband’s authority is so stomped on that he often becomes jealous of the preacher. But, see, preacher is supposed to recognize husband as the head of his household. And preacher is supposed to let the Titus women at church teach the women to love their families and be keepers at home. Mother shouldn’t be running out from under her husband’s priesthood to another man’s authoirity. If she wants to go to church, then her husband is to find a preacher that he feels that he can learn under. And then he is to bring his family to this church. The preacher shouldn’t have a harem of women chasing him asking him personal questions.

BIBLE REALITY

As we Christian wives are compared to Christ at the cross, we have to wonder, “Why does the church teach so many ideas that are not Biblical?”

Often Preacher loves to control the women at church. He loves the way they leave their husbands at home and chase Preacher and ask him for personal counseling. They become one with him and his thinking. This is how the love affairs begin at church. The church secretary is the only one who really understands preacher. She becomes one with him in spirit and then in the flesh.

When family order is thrown out the door of a church, then ya gotta wonder why. Certainly preacher can read the word, can’t he? It’s obvious that husband is to lead the family. But if preacher is goosin’ the lady secretary, then he ain’t about to talk about male authority in the home. He wants to be the authority in everyone’s home.

And, ya know, if you ladies are like me, it’s very easy to slip out from under our husband’s authority. It’s hard to submit to our husbands — it’s meant to be hard. The heaviness of the yoke of submission is to keep you running back to prayer and to Christ. But we miss it all, right here. The heavy yoke comes upon us and we run for an easy escape and, sadly, a lot of Christian women run to preacher and to the church to escape their places at home.

As Jesus prayed in the Garden for this cup of suffering to be taken from Him, we as wives come often to this garden of suffering, too. We are called to take on a yoke that we never bargained for. We are asked to carry a load that we know we can’t carry. We want things to go smoothly at home and it don’t and we think, “Why, Lord, what is wrong?”

And the answer is, “Nothing, dear heart … all is well.”

And we speak out of a bitterness in our hearts as the work is overwhelming and the baby is up in the night again and again. We so long for a sweet hour of prayer. We can’t think, let alone pray. The enemy tells us that everything is all wrong. We are out of control and we think God is not watching over us. Yet He is, and He understands a Mother’s Heart. But “church happens” in this place of mental suffering as you continue to persue your true Husband, Jesus Christ. As you will refuse to give up. As you refuse to escape your place in Christ as keeper at home.

Some of you flit from feminism to homemaking and back and forth. This causes you to be unstable in all of your ways. You become double minded. As the problems at home heat up. you change back to feminism. You feel things are hopeless. Yet, if you will just keep persuing Christ as the pressure mounts at home, then the anointing will come. You will find a new strength and a more powerful anointing. Don’t run to church to escape your callings. The answer is at home.

And, ya know, if your husband is such a problem, then the Lord will cause him to leave you to protect you and the children. The Bible speaks that if the unbeliever should leave, then let him leave. But the Christian wife has no place in Christ to leave her husband. That’s not Biblical. It’s a religious idea that the worldy church has taught, and this teaching is blaspheming the word of God.

We miss it if we as women run out of our places of obedience and try to espcape our callings in God. The church is at home. Your place of teaching and spiritual growth is in your home where God has called you to be. Satan will try to chase you out continually. You will not learn faith and perserverence at church like you will at home.

If God can’t change your husband and you have to give up on him? Then this alone will scar your heart for life. You will never get over it. In the back of your mind, a demon has taken up a residence. He will forever tell you this, “Some husbands can’t be saved. Yes, God can perform the impossible but not always. Some people’s sins are too big even for God.” Now you may not say that openly but it’s in your heart.

THE SUFFERING WIFE

Dear Hearts, I am writing to you who suffer in your homes. I am sorry for your sufferings. But don’t be tempted by the worldly church to give up. They will offer you and your children food and shelter for a while. But in the end, they will gossip about you and wonder about you. “Why couldn’t you please your husband? Was it your fault, too?”

Many churches have no guts or backbone. They won’t teach the pure word of God concerning suffering. It’s all this teaching about “God doesn’t want you to suffer.”

Well, ok, here is some reality for ya. Women who are submissive to their husbands can never be owned. They are not putty in Preacher’s hand. But you get a woman who is boss in the family with a job? Oh, how preacher loves her! He knows the wife will tithe to him and make her husband tithe, too. So he doubles his money if he can get wifey to be Boss. In most churches of today, the wife runs the show. And she is just foolish enough to give her life and her sacred honor to the preacher. You see pews and pews of women at church, with a man here and there. And if this man was to stand up and preach wifely submission, then most of the church would get up and leave. And “Good Riddance.”

Come on, fess up, you know I am tellin’ the truth. I know I am just dumb enough to be the kid in the back who yells to the crowd, “The Emperor has no clothes.” The crowd is yelling and having a great time ooohing and aaahhing over the Emperor’s new clothes.

The herd loves to run together and to please one another. And, like a stampede of buffalo, they all run off a cliff together. As if murdering yourself was a good idea, as “Darling, your friends are all doing it, so it must be right.”

And this is how most divorce comes about in the home. “My goodness, it must be ok because Sally Jones got one and she is a Bible teacher. She went to church all of her life and her parents have been in the ministry for 100 years plus. And she got a divorce so I did, too.”

Well, Sally Jones ain’t takin’ you to heaven, Baby Girl. And the only way to heaven is through the truth of God’s word. And the Bible does not tell a Christian woman that it is ok to leave her unbelieving husband. We as women who love God should be examples to the unbelieving husbands. When He was reviled, He reviled not again. He died upon the cross for the unrighteous and not the righteous person. Until we suffer for the unrighteous, we will not share in His glory, as we have not shared in His sufferings.

Don’t miss the lesson here. Don’t miss your opportunity to be like Christ as you suffer for righteousness sake. Be aflame with love for Christ and be the first in your family to say, “I am sorry — it was my fault.” Quit trying to win the battles with your husbands and give up.

Be zealous to please Christ in your sufferings. Be grateful to suffer for Him and His body. Count it all Joy when you fall into diverse temptations. Knowing that the trying of your faith works patience. Let patience have her perfect work that you will be complete and entire wanting nothing. Rejoice when men speak evil against you, knowing that the true men and women of God were also spoken evil against. You will be misunderstood as you follow Christ.

You are bought with a price. He shed His blood for you. Will you give up your will and your high honors in this world for Him? Will you take up your cross and follow Him? Your cross may be a hard marriage. Will you stay in your place of obedience and calling for His sake? Or will you come down off your cross and miss the calling He has given you? Do you love Him enough to suffer for Him? Will you give up your life for Him?

I am so glad that Jesus was faithful to the Cross. He could have called 10,000 angels to come to his rescue. But He didn’t. He died alone.

SURVIVAL

Ya know, yesteday I got one of my favorite magazines in the mail, “Countryside.” I read a story about the Depression era. This man was saying that during this period they worked mainly for survival. Meaning that they had few luxuries … well, none, really. They had to work from dusk to dawn to keep food on the table and a roof over their heads. And I thought of today and I said to myself, “Well, what do ya think we have to do today?”

But, see, it’s a spiritual thing now. I mean we all have the food we need for the most part and we have a roof over our heads. Well, the ladies on this group I think do, for the most part. But our Depression Era that we Mothers are fighting is mostly at this point spiritual. There is a famine in our world right now and it is a famine of the word of God. The word is not taught as it once was. And, of course, the collapse of the church will eventually cause a physical Depression like the 1930s. And we must be diligent to continue to build our temples … our homes in the wilderness.

Nehemiah taught the people of God to build their walls of protection back up with a sword in one hand and a building tool in the other hand. The Jewish people had to make a physical home and a spiritual home at the same time. And this is the game plan for us as keepers at home. We must fight two wars … one spiritual and one physical.

We are called as keepers at home. This is our place under God’s obedience. As we stay here, we are safe in Him. But we will go from spiritual wars to physical. As we fight a physical war to keep the money flowin’ into the home, we may say, “Well, I sure can’t afford to get pregnant. We can’t afford the children we have.” And yet in the spiritual war, you can’t afford not to have the children. The spiritual realm is the true you where your conscience lives. You best not offend it as you will lose your physical war eventually if you aren’t true to your spirt. Or true to your inner man. Your spiritual self is what goes on to heaven to live forever and ever, so don’t sell your soul for a pot of soup. Or for a moment of pleasure in this life.

Well I am needing to quit writing. I am getting clear into another writing. But today, let’s get out our Bibles and lay them on the table and refer to them as we care for our families. Let’s take up our rolling pins in one hand and our Bibles in the other. Let’s fight the good fight of faith and not give up until we see His glory. With one hand we carry our swords, the word of God in our hearts. And with the other hand we carry the baby. As we fight the good fight of faith, we learn to know Christ. As we suffer, we become good ground for the word of God to be planted. Our hearts suffer as it seems they are pierced with fear. And yet we become yielded to Christ.

Jesus never defended Himself. He only defended God. He never stood up for his rights but only the rights of the Father God. And as we lay down our desires and take on His understanding, we become true soldiers of the Cross. True believers. Branches extending from the True Vine Christ Jesus.

Ya know, dear Housewives and Mothers, we can have peace in this corrupt world. “Thou will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed upon Thee.” Also the scripture that talks about being in peace and this is our confidence. I think, too, of the scripture that says the works of righteousness brings peace. As we cook and bake in our kitchens and as we trust in God for today, we will find peace and confidence.

Every wise woman builds her home. Wisdom is the stability of our times. In this world of confusion, we must cast down vain imaginations and everything that exalts itself above the knowledge of God. We are in this evil world but we are not of it … we are just a-passin’ through. We must work for eternity.

We are not to take part in the fear about us. We are not daughters who have no Father. We are the lights of the world. We are strong Mothers of faith and holiness. Our lives are not out of control. Our Father has a plan for us. We are not as street whores or the strange women of Proverbs. We are the daughters of wisdom. God is our Father and He has a plan for us. Jesus gave His life for us and He is the author and the finisher of our faith. Psalms 91 says that a thousand will fall around us but we will not be harmed. We are called to be confident.

We are called as wise women to be the lights and examples in this dark and confused world. We are called to be victorious, to be the answer and not the problem. As we see those who grieve about us, we can be in our kitchens cooking and baking and singing. We are not called to grieve as those who have no Father God.

As the world tears down its foundations, we must be continually building ours back up. The world can either come to our side or go with the hell bent. We Mothers are called to peace.

The men of God have been shackled in our country as women have taken over and belted them in the you know what. I hate that. I don’t want to see a man cry as some do today. I want a man that is strong and full of courage. That Papa is sure full of vinegar and I wouldn’t want him any other way. And some of you are married to hard men. Well, I will tell ya, in the long run of a marriage be glad. I mean, the Lord knew it would take a strong man to keep me in line. And Papa is just the ticket. How I get away with all this writing is beyond me. Well, it’s just the Lord. He makes a way where there is no way.

But ya know, as the world howls around us, we need to be makin’ cookies, breads and cakes. Speaking of cakes, I have to make a birthday cake for Mary today.

For supper this evening, I will fix bar-B-Q sprare ribs and cheese potatoes. I make my own bar-b-q sauce. I make it with a can of tomato soup, mustard, and brown sugar. Then I put in an onion slice or two and green peppers. Also salt and black pepper. I bake the meat in the oven for hours and hours until the meat falls off the bone. Bake on low.

Anyway, I had better get goin’. But today, dear Mothers, “Be Happy.” All is well in Him. He is still on the throne and is still running this side show. As we trust in Him and work in our homes and make peace, then we will find His righteousness. We will find stability in wisdom through obedience as Keepers at Home.

Dear Mothers,

It’s early morning. I was praying in my bed and knew the Lord was calling me to get up and write. I am telling the Lord, “Oh, Lord, this bed is so warm and comfortable next to Papa.” Yet I knew that the Lord was stirring me and calling me. Many times I have ignored His early morning call. I have lived to regret it, as then I have to go the whole day with a message in my heart and wait again for the night to write it. Kind of like swallowing an elephant and holding it in all day. It’s better to just obey the Lord and get it over with, then rest.

Yesterday I got to rest, thank the Lord. Papa and I watched this preacher on tv. Anyway, I liked what he was saying. It was such a sweet message about loving the body of Christ. About sticking with folks and praying them through. It was a good message. It had a lot of truth to it. It was about seeing a believer do something wrong and praying for them and not gossiping about them, etc. Yet the sermon was missing something. It was like drinking Pepsi that sat out all night. It was missing the sizzle, POP and BANG!!!

Anyway, I was praying to myself about it. I said to the Lord, “Oh, Lord, probably what I teach is a crock of bull. Maybe I wind too much up in the home and family.” The Lord reminded me of 1 Peter 3:1 “Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands.” 1 Peter 2 is a writing about Christ and His work at the cross and then Chapter 3 begins with “Likewise ye wives…” In other words, we as wives act out the work of Christ on the cross, as keepers at home. Now, this is the backbone of Christ’s teachings to us wives.

Then the Bible speaks to the heads of households that if they want to have a place in the church, they must have their families in order. The preacher, as he talked, spoke only of the church ministry. How we should behave and relate to the other members of the church building. Of course, Preacher always refers to the ones who are in church as the “Body of Christ.”

The Lord spoke again to my heart that Jesus is to be our personal Savior. Jesus is with us when Baby cries in the night and we get up to care for him. We are not just operating in the gifts of the Spirit when we are at church and can relate to another church member. We learn to take on Christ as we lay in bed beside a husband who has sinned against us and we have forgiven him. If Jesus isn’t your personal Savior in the night in your bed with your husband, then He is not your personal Savior at all. In other words, it’s how ya operate when no one from church is there with ya.

Lately I have been counseled by my mentor MaryL. I was having terrible headaches and she has prayed me through for the millionth time. Thank God for this godly Mother of age 75 (I think) … but she told me, “Connie, your writing has power in it ONLY because you live it. You quit living it and only write about it and the power will leave you.” Very wise words from the older woman. And, by the way, Mary and Russ are married and divorced — have been married now for 29 years — yet they have been the glue that has kept my marriage together many times. Jim and I wouldn’t have any sorry hide left if it were not for Mary and Russ.

But, heck fire, we can all behave at church. Yet the Body of believers is not only at church. The Lord’s body is made up of those who know Him as personal Shepherd. We are a part of many other believers that we don’t even know about. We know them in the Spirit, but not always in the flesh.

See, many of you all know me in the spirit. When I write something you say, “Well, that gives me peace and helps me to understand the wisdom of God.” This is because the Lord spoke this to you first and my writings somehow cleared the message so you could hear it better. Jesus is the teacher if you are a true believer. You hear His voice and another’s voice you will not follow. He is the true Shepard.

Ya know, in the organized church building, it seems to me the false shepard stands by the feeding trough and will try to convince the sheep that the food is good. And (supposedly) if they were true sheep, they would love the food and they would come often to eat it. And they don’t want to eat it because they are rebellious. And so the hungry sheep keep eating the false shepherd’s food and wondering why they cant digest it. And the false shepherd tells them, “Well, you would like it and digest it if you were a true follower of Christ.” Yet this does not play out in the word of God. The true sheep hear the shepherd’s voice and another they will not follow.

Ya know, years ago, my brother Scott had a flock of sheep. We would go out with him to feed them. Oh, when they heard his voice, they came running to the fence! Scott didn’t have to convince the hungry sheep to eat. They loved him and trusted him and they didn’t stand idle when they heard his voice. Even if Scott was talking to one of us away from the fence, the sheep would hear him and come running. They knew his voice and they knew his food was good. They had never gotten sick from the food he had fed them and they knew his food would be familiar to them.

The Bible says that Jesus told the disciples to feed His sheep if they loved Him. So a true shepherd is one who feeds you spiritually and the food is familiar and sweet. You love the shepherd and can’t wait to hear His message. He teaches you not be afraid n the dark when husband is late coming home … it is in this place of fear and panic that Christ proves Himself as Lord of all. If Jesus isn’t with us to help and protect us at home, then He isn’t with us at all. Our true fellowship is with the Father God. As we know Him and live on His body ad blood, we come into the body of believers and we are able to be a blessing to them. And it is never us who is the blessing but Christ’s power in us. And the power of God comes upon us as we keep company with the Power Jesus Christ.

You won’t get power from the fleshly so called fellowship you get at church. Just because you eat a potluck dinner and sit next to a spiritual person, it won’t just rub off on you. Well, it will if you are a new believer. But if Satan has a choke hold on you and is pulling your fingernails out by the roots, then no one can help you but the shepherd. True fellowship is with the true shepherd, Jesus Christ. As you are built up in Him, then you have something to bring to the body of believers. Then what you say will ring a bell and call the sheep to a true supper that will feed them, refresh them and make them strong and able to face sudden fears and dangers. If He, Jesus Christ, is not your own Savior then you have nothing to bring to the body of believers.

Often the weeds among us choke us with guilt and condemnation. The weeds are the folks among us that we can’t discern or understand. They don’t hear our shepherd and we can’t understand them. They have a familiar ring in their voice and yet their message is unclear. Now, Jez is like that, too. She has a few familiar rings to what she says and yet? Not really. This is a deception, as each deception has a truth to it or we wouldn’t get caught in it. Right? I mean, if someone is an obvious liar, then we won’t get caught by them. We would never follow them.

I guess the message here tonight is to discern the spirts around you to see if they are of God. Is Jesus your Savior and provider?

The home is the first church and this is where the true Christian learns to put on Christ. Your home is your church. And as you learn His power here at home, you are able to bring to the body of believers food that will feed and nourish them. If you are only getting teachings that tell you how to respond to other church members, then it is an escape from your true responsibilities in the body of believers. The home has to come first.

Some of you wives face a hell on earth and the church is just not feeding you at all. Jesus is your answer and your only answer.

Ya know, if you have a couple problems, then these so called Christian “How To” Books are your ticket out. You CAN do what they say to do and the flesh will, in a way, take you through. But you get some old boy that is your husband and demon possessed from the “Get Go” — ain’t no “How To” book out there that will make that old mule walk. Forget it. In the Bible is the story of the demon possessed man that ran naked among the tombs. The Bible says that no man could tame him. No “How To” books would have helped that wild monster. But, ya know, Jesus healed him. He wasn’t hopeless. Jesus set him free.

And we are living now in an age where many around us are demon oppressed. These folks are suffering and going to counselors, etc. But no flesh is the answer for these people. Unless they find the true healer of their souls, they won’t be healed.

Jesus Christ is the answer. And you can know Him as YOUR True and LIVING SAVIOR. If He can’t heal your husband, then how can you know Him as the true lover of your soul? God didn’t leave Daniel in the lions’ den to be eaten or in the firey furnace to burn. God doesn’t leave His sheep in the dessert to die. He has a voice and He calls you to safety and rest. He leads you beside the still waters. He will restore your soul. He is the God of VICTORY AND PROMISE. Turn away from the world and hear the true Shepherd’s Voice, Jesus Christ.